


When we Were Angels

by gabsmatos, Redboozter



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:21:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 34,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23298457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gabsmatos/pseuds/gabsmatos, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redboozter/pseuds/Redboozter
Summary: This story begins before the history itself.Before time counts as time.Before Crowley and any other demon existed.Before Aziraphale met Crowley, at the beginning of those 6000 years, which they really considered, the beginning of everything.But not before Aziraphale and Crowley existed, at least in a different and immemorial way for themselves.Before the Fall.* Roleplay adaptation *
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale & Raphael (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Raphael (Good Omens)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Redboozter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redboozter/gifts).



This story begins before the story itself.

Before time counts as time.

Before Crowley and any other Demon existed.

Before Aziraphale met Crowley, at the beginning of those 6000 years, which they really considered, the beginning of everything.

However, not before Aziraphale and Crowley existed, at least in a different and immemorial way for themselves.

Before ‘the Fall’. The sauntered vaguely downwards as he had mentioned.

Aziraphale was designed as a Principality at that time. Even before the Garden of Eden existed and the idea of Earth had begun. Each Angel had its designation, Crowley, now still Raphael, the Archangel, was designed to the creation of stars, while Aziraphale received his flaming sword from the Creator.

Aziraphale only saw the Archangel from afar. Who didn’t know Raphael with his long curly red hair that always stood out and his fingertips that seemed to shine when he was in his craft of creating stars? Azi didn't have the courage to approach or speak to him, shy as he was, but the admiration was already enormous even though he kept some safe distance.

As already suggested before, going back a little at the heart of all history, Creation was perfect, impeccable. There were no loose ends in it. The beauty of everything that existed was undeniable and Her love seemed to inspire each of her creations equally, none of them doubting how sublime each detail, each definition was.

There were no beings without a purpose there. Everything was beautifully hierarchical, built with the aim of always functioning at Her will. Angels, of all categories, from the simplest, to those closest to the Divine, were supposed to be perfect beings, incapable of making mistakes or having attitudes that fled kindness and love.

Angels learned from each other and from the wisest, what wasn’t possible to know given their little experience or Divine gift. And there was no reason not to believe that everything that was said was true: That God's love was unconditional, but respect for the Laws dictated by it was even more important.

At least, that was what Gabriel and other Archangels were talking about, with the exception of Raphael, not because he was aloof, but because his job wasn’t related to that. He was always busy with Creation itself and recognized its greatness in practice. Stars, brightness and beauty had just little to do with love and other beings, at least was what the Archangel thought.

He didn’t know Aziraphale, even by sight. However, something was going to change soon. An unpretentious encounter, like the one that in the future brought them together in the Garden of Eden, would take place today.

Raphael, exhausted from his tasks, returned to rest in Heaven. This time we speak of that Heaven that people imagine they can go to after they die, only slightly different from what our idea of it usually comes from. Observant, he sat under a tree, close to where a group of Angels gathered together for some activity.

Aziraphale, that same afternoon was learning how to use his flaming sword. Far from wanting to hurt other beings, but the truth was that he had to know how to defend himself in order to be a good Principality ... His greatest obligation and mission was to defend what he was assigned to. He still didn't know what it was, but it would certainly be of paramount importance.

He was slightly far from the group of Angels. Shy as he was, he couldn’t make friends so easily, dedicating himself almost always to his duties to learn and exercise Her word. Her Divine love and lessons were his greatest guides ... Except when his mind wandered to the Archangel named Raphael, that messed up all this thoughts and who this time, was closer than usual.

The Angel stopped what he was doing and noticed the tired face of the other. Had Raphael worked too hard? For a moment he was worried, he didn't want his ... The other Angel seeming that tired. He approached him slowly, putting the sword aside putting on the most concerned face he could make.

Aziraphale swallowed hard, not knowing how to start that conversation. He cleared his throat "Is everything okay?" He asked as something casual, not a hello, nor introduced himself, but showed concern and affection for the other. Was he too bold? He didn't even know him...

He didn't laid a hand on him but still looked at him from where he was and by God, how wonderful his hair color was. He sighed. Surely Raphael wouldn’t pay attention to him ... Wouldn’t even want to know his name, while Aziraphale knew his by heart.

Raphael continued his passive task of capturing information from his surroundings while sitting by that tree, not the ideal place for a nap, but the first he had actually found, since he didn’t intend to sleep yet.

Soon he noticed an Angel different from the others. He didn't have an athletic body like most, or even thin. Cute was exactly the word that defined him and that was what the Archangel thought of him.

In addition to being somewhat funny, the awkward way in which he tried to lift the sword, completely losing his center of gravity and eventually dropping it was priceless and hilarious. Well, who knows being different was interesting, the word charming wasn’t yet available, as well as probably the first person to think that being different was good had been Raphael himself.

Raphael saw the Principality approaching, surprised by such boldness, but instead of being rude at being treated so roughly, he simply smiled and answered him. "I'm fine, Angel. Just tired." He didn't know his name, so why not call him Angel?

It was easy to know that Raphael was an Archangel, even if his hair was that color. Their wings were different. Three pairs of each. When Aziraphale got a little closer, as if he wanted to play with him because of his boldness, the Angel could notice that his face seemed to shine with small fragments that resembled stars.

"Was that all you wanted to know?" He said with a mischievous smile.

Aziraphale couldn’t contain the bright red that rose his cheeks when he was spontaneously called Angel. He looked in other direction trying to control himself. Why being called that way made him so uncomfortable? Perhaps because he was an Archangel and not a simple Angel calling him ... He couldn't say.

Aziraphale sat next to him, being even more daring. Seeing that the Archangel approached instead of feeling insulted, he froze in place. His beauty was unspeakable. That being in front of him just shone.

Instead of freckles he seemed to have shiny stones across his face... It wasn't just his hair that was stunning, himself was a work of art. He looked down, ashamed of his round shapes, his awkward manner and his clear lack of beauty or any attribute next to each other.

"I ... My name is Aziraphale ..." He said, licking his lips as if he hadn't known his name since forever. "I would like to know your name ..." He turned to him and saw that mischievous smile. Oh Heavens. He was sure that his limbs for a moment became jelly. He pretended not to know Raphael’s name and start a friendship from the bottom.

What a gorgeous Archangel was by his side. He admired him a little too much as his cheeks turned even redder and his eyes never left Raphael's.

Aziraphale, being pale as he was, showed every stronger emotion. The feeling was clear, but the Archangel quickly disguised it, which gave him the benefit of the doubt. And even if Raphael had indeed seen all the growing blush, he wouldn’t be able to interpret the meaning of that reaction. He hadn't said anything.

He watched with amusement as the other was even bolder, sitting beside him as a longtime friend, who had known him for just over two minutes. He laughed and he disguised it, observing the fluffy and pink faces of the Angel who had caught his attention due to his peculiarities, as well as physical ones, the complete innocence and absence in the social treatment he was used to receive. What Raphael thought it was fantastic, no one could explain but him, or maybe not even him.

"Oh, my name is Raphael. The Archangel ... You must have heard of me..." He said with a large proud smile and took Aziraphale's arm briefly, as if that highlighted his speech, applying a non-verbal marker to it. He also looked at him in the eye with a sweeter smile. Maybe he didn't do it on purpose. "You have an interesting name. It's almost ... Raphael ..." He laughed.

Aziraphale extremely pink in the presence of the Archangel failed miserably to hide his happiness being so close to the other. Ah if he knew how long he watched him that way ...

"Yes I have..." he smiled widely "I mean, many Angels have heard of you, you are well known" he stroked his ego. He felt his arm being touched and flinched, startling slightly and tensing.

"Many..." he cleared his throat seeing again how much the other Angel's face shone, his beauty was breathtaking "Angels name have that suffix ‘el’... It's quite common ..." he blushed again with a shaky breath.

His smile dissipated when his pupils dilated and his mouth went dry for an instant. "I think your name is as beautiful as you are," he said innocently and laughed softly. _Lovely._

"Yes, I believe I must be, although I am not as present as the others. At least not here," Raphael explained without explaining, as he didn’t say where he used to be. "But I come here to rest, to look at the landscape, to be inspired to create for Her. Everything in this place is so perfect..." He spoke sitting straighter, leaning towards the Angel, inevitably looking at his perfect face, painted in pink.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." After all, what could an Angel do to another to harm? "Yes, yes... It's practically the same name. Taking out Azi and moving a letter ... How interesting. Are you really okay, Angel?" He asked observing his nervous reaction, it was something new, a kind of fear mixed with another feeling that he didn’t know.

"Do you think I'm ... beautiful?" He asked rhetorically. "Thank you. I was never told that. You are also handsome, Aziraphale." But he wouldn’t dare to say the details that came into his mind to describe the beauty of his new friend. He thought he could be invasive, just like the touch he had previously made on his arm.

Aziraphale unconsciously bit his lip, becoming more nervous at the proximity of the other. Did Raphael do this to all the Angels he met? It was certainly quite intimidating. But even so, he didn’t retreat. Archangels were meant to be like that right? Bold, not scared, and even more of a lower degree Angel.

"I see ... It's an excellent choice of place ... A beautiful coincidence." Aziraphale said with a genuine smile. He was really happy that their paths crossed at just that point. "It really is perfection ..." he said staring at him and not speaking exactly about the place itself but about his company as well.

"You didn't scare me, I just ..." he said awkwardly "I'm not used to physical contact." he confessed embarrassed. As the Angel was shy everything was new to him, even coming from someone like Raphael, who was so well known and who he wanted to be close so bad. "I know you won't hurt me" He smiled more affectionately, totally sure of that. "Yes, I am ..." _'better now with you here'_ he thought.

He nodded timidly. "Your face seems to shine." He raised his hand and touched it with his fingertips. A new sensation invaded the Angel with the touch and praise. He went red again. "Never? Well, they should, I mean definitely its what they think even not telling you" he said in surprise. "Your hair color is very different from ordinary Angels ..." his fingers went to his strands. They were also soft. Oh Heavens. Raphael was just the perfection.

Certainly the Archangel didn’t do this on purpose, this approach which didn’t allow the other to defend himself. It could be something of his angelic class, that presence of spirit, that courage that he himself didn’t perceive as such, nor as something negative either. But Aziraphale had piqued his interest, so he naturally got closer.

He breathed in as if he took on a clear, pure forest air. But it was Heaven. The purest air ever. "Everything that has ever been created and will be, can only be perfect because it was inspired by Her."

"Ah ... I didn't know. Maybe I'm too nice. Some people don't like touching, right?" He briefly reflected on his own actions. He was just like that, a kindness calculated by rationality, if that explanation was good enough to reflect how harmoniously these aspects were mixed. "Oh, sure ... I would never hurt you ..." He was right. Never ever.

He touched his face in a reflection. "Yes ... It's true. I think I got some star dust left here" He joked, watching and feeling what the other was doing, not knowing how to behave or hot to feel about it. But somehow, he was happy.

"I bet your almost white curls are also soft. You are a very different Angel, if I may point. In a good way." He wasn't going to ask to touch his hair. "And your face ... It's so pale. I can see when the blood colors your cheeks." He laughed unpretentiously because he had the courage to say that.

"Really, Divine creations are perfection." Aziraphale agreed with the Archangel's consideration. He swallowed. It wasn't that he didn't like touch, but that particular Raphael’s touch had caught him off guard.

"I knew that your job is to create stars, I ... I must confess that I always wanted to know and follow closely how the process is ..." He said awkwardly "it must be something so beautiful to stare at…" he said contemplating the sparkle in his eyes from the other. Raphael seemed fully enlightened at that moment.

He laughed softly when he spoke of his hair "Touch and tell me if they are ..." He encouraged him mischievously. He blushed at the compliment and looked down nervously and with his heart racing in that confession.

"I'm sorry ..." he said in a whisper. "As a Principality, I have a lot of work taking care of what I'm assigned to. Sometimes I end up getting pinker when I'm under the sun cataloging flowers ..." He amended.

Aziraphale had that hair color since always. He thought it was cuz he was always getting sun burnt cuz of his work. That blonde almost white was so boring compared to Raphael’s fire hair….

"Yes ... In general this is it. At least what people comment on is this," Raphael commented humbly, not wanting to talk about his deeds or their importance. But he smiled when he spoke of it, a full smile that seemed to come from the bottom of his essence. "If you want to see ... I mean ... If that's allowed, one day I could ... Show you what I do."

He had already taken a step forward a little earlier, now the other challenged him a little more. "Can I?" He spoke running his thin fingers between strands of messy white hair. "They are soft as feathers, Angel. And that color ..." Then he remembered to move his hand away, as advised by good manners.

He smiled, trying to understand what that feeling inside him meant. Something warm… It was new. Only that he knew. "Cataloging flowers?" How adorable!

"I would love to!" Aziraphale said happily trying not to sound too tipsy. It seemed so much more important dealing with starts than his own function ... So more beautiful, if he was allowed to follow closely, oh how happy he would be!

He felt his body shudder at the touch of the other. He sat down to remove his hand "W-what's wrong with it’s color ...?" He opened his eyes, staring at him embarrassed. Raphael didn’t like to touch his hair….?

"Yes, I asked Her to do something while the place I must protect as a Principality is not ready for it... She ordered me to catalog the flowers of Her creation. It is not a job as important as yours but ... "he laughed awkwardly, even so he really liked what he did and would love the company of the other to perform this role.

_But he knew he couldn't stand in his way._


	2. Request

Raphael knew that a good excuse was needed when performing a task that could be considered useless or expendable. "You can catalog more than just flowers ... It's just an idea."

"Ah, most of the hair around here is blond, or brown. Yours is blond, so light that it looks like snow." The color wasn’t related to age yet, so the Archangel didn't point out that detail. They both looked like adults, but Raphael didn't know human concepts of age yet, so that didn't apply.

"Well, like I said, we can always extend ..." He tried to look for words. "I don't know, the ineffability of your work."

"More?" The Angel asked incredulously. Would the Almighty trust him to catalog more than just flowers? It made him feel so happy Raphael thought he was that capable. "And yes ... If not to bother, ask Her for permission someday for me." He smiled sweetly at him, innocent, he really wanted that.

Aziraphale ran his fingers through his hair, visibly embarrassed, as if he hadn't noticed the detail of its color before. "It ... It was always like this." He smiled when he saw that the other one liked the color of it. Something he was ashamed of for some time ... It was very different from the other Angels. So pale, so boring.

Aziraphale nodded "And then maybe we can rest here when we are done with our chores?" He suggested totally naive. It didn't seem like a bad idea, did it?

"Yes ... but first I need to know if you’re good enough. What do you do with the flowers, how do you catalog them?" Asked the sly Archangel, wanting to know if the other one only did descriptions (Which was something very vague considering that they didn’t have many adjectives for that) or if he did some engraving or drawing.

"I liked it very much. You are really... _peculiar_." He laughed a little, but not out of derision but because he found it amusing to observe those somewhat unusual details in the Principality, while he was also not unusual for an Archangel. He felt identified, perhaps, for the first time.

"Yes ... here or ... somewhere else." He mysteriously added.

Aziraphale frowned slightly at the Archangel. Was he good enough? It was the Almighty Herself who entrusted him with this task! It was like asking if he was good enough at creating stars. It looked like an affront.

"I have my very own catalog. " He said proud of himself " Where I have the design of each of the flowers created by Her, you must have the same thing of your constellations, don't you?" He replied the question wanting to look smart." But I know almost all of them by heart now ...."

His face turned red with the compliment. He had been called many things before, but not ... peculiar. "I think we both are," he shrugged, trying to act nonchalant to the compliment and failing miserably. "Another place?" He asked more curious.

"Do you have any other places where you usually go to rest?" Was that a formal invitation to hang out together? He was wondering if it was. "Who knows could I show you some of my places? " They weren't as interesting as that one but they had ... Flowers.

Raphael was an Archangel and, as such, he had the right to act like an ass from time to time. However, that wasn’t what had motivated his previous speech, but curiosity. "No, I don't, but I can show them to you, since they've been in the Universe for a long time, I suppose. Can I see the catalog?"

"I don't care about being peculiar. If I am like that there must be a reason for that only She knows." He looked at the other, realizing that he didn’t understand well. "Yes. There are a lot of galaxies out there. The weather isn't always ideal, but the view pays off. What did you think it was?" He tilted his head when the other made a proposal so subtle yet so cute. "Really? Am I your friend already?"

Aziraphale in a matter of seconds opened the most honest bright and sincere smile of all. Nobody was ever interested in his botany catalog. He didn't even think he knew how to draw that skillfully. "O-of course, would you like to see them now ...?" He asked excitedly.

"I assume that to see the constellations only at night, right?" He asked evidently interested, that already gave them another opportunity to see each other. He knew the stars were all made by Raphael's hands and he had gazed them for so long he couldn’t even count... However the Angel preferred to be quiet about this detail and let him perform them for himself as a private show. He spent hours admiring the beauty of the sky ... He wouldn't say it out loud.

"I don't know, they could be any kind of place, not necessarily for rest" he shrugged. They could be for a date or something, when they wanted to see each other, foolish Angel. "Would you like us to be? I would be honored ..." Aziraphale smiled sweetly slightly saddened.

He was no friend of any Archangel, none of the Angels of the highest caste wanted to be friends with a simple Principality. He himself had no friends. He looked at the horizon to hide his sorrow thinking about that.

"Yes, if it isn't a bother to you showing me." Raphael smiled noticing that the Angel would probably like someone else to see his work. Maybe not many beings would be interested in seeing that kind of thing. Or it was how he interpreted the Principality's radiant animation.

Of course, God appreciated it, but She wasn't much into show up for personal praise. "Ah, Angel, of course. From where we are, we can only see their glow ..." He laughed, throwing his body against the tree trunk and stretching as if he was sleepy.

"Well, then I don't think you will be bored. As long as, of course, you are allowed to join me. First, work, then rest." Ah, but he didn't exactly explain the nature of that task, leaving the Angel confused by the order of the factors. He wanted to see the catalog first. "I think so. Do you want to be my friend?" He returned the question a little silly, just as a child would do.

"No way!" Aziraphale said smiling broadly looking like a child with a new toy. He was called Angel again and that strange sensation inside his body came back, funny.

He noticed the Archangel stretching, acting more comfortably with himself, and giggled, evidently happy with that, barely able to contain his joy. He did the same as the other as he leaned against the tree trunk, getting closer to Raphael, seeing that his freckles had a different glow now.

"I will speak to Her as soon as possible." He said assertively already preparing the speech to beg the Almighty to join Raphael. "We are still at rest time so ..." He thought they could see the catalog in the meantime.

"I do." In reality, Aziraphale wanted much more than that. He approached him as if showing interest in his body language. Again enchanted by the glow on the other's face, he spent a few seconds just admiring Raphael. His first real friend.

Was this how he should feel? Racing heart? Flushed face? It didn't seem like a simple friendship ... But he stood there waiting for the other to say what he wanted from himself, silently.

"Good. Do it before I doze off ..." Raphael joked, waiting for the object to appear. He liked flowers, plants, nature in general. However, he didn't want to look too excited, after all, his job was different. He scratched his eyes and looked again at the Angel and his sword, crossing his legs at the ankles.

"Will you really?" He asked in surprise. How brave of such a cute Angel! "Well, but didn't I tell you what I need you for, or did I say and forget?"

"Ah, so it's okay. _We are friends._ " He spoke naturally, without noticing what he was doing to the other. He wasn't his first friend, and for now, he wasn't the most special either. However, there would be time for things to change. "You’re red as a cherry, Aziraphale!"

The Angel wasted no time waving his hands and materializing his catalog on the other's lap before he fell asleep. In no way he wanted Raphael to lose interest in his work.

Aziraphale dropped the object as soon as he took it in his hands. Need him? A Principality? Why would an Archangel need him? His heart raced again and he went red. "I-I will! I won't go back on my word!" He said without blinking, trying to ignore the part that was needed.

After controlling himself and placing the catalog on the Archangel's lap, he took a deep breath before showing it to the other, after all Raphael was the first person to do this ... something he never imagined doing: Showing his work to a friend. He smiled again happily genuinely

"I'm not!" He replied, leafing through the object in his hands, starting to talk about each one of the flowers. They were dangerously close .... But he wasn't going to give up now.

Raphael was almost passing out when the book weighed on his lap. He grunted and shook his head, having completely lost Aziraphale's last sentences. The Archangel lived without fear, because nothing he knew could threaten him, that was the purest truth. With the exception of a few ants perhaps, nothing would disturb his nap.

"What were you saying? Ah ... never mind," he said, paying attention to the catalog. Soon he was excited with the flowers. He interrupted Aziraphale's speech from time to time to express his enchantment. "Oh this one! Where did you find it? And this one? It has beautiful colors! I've never seen one like this. Impressive! Scrumptious! Gorgeous, Angel!" And he smiled like a boy excited about a new toy.

Aziraphale was increasingly delighted at how his new friend reacted by telling him about those silly flowers. He tried his best to talk about the color, the shape and the odor ... Regretting not having the example of one of each there with him so he could really enjoy the creation of the Almighty. The Angel didn’t even think he drawn that well.

His eyes shone with emotion at being able to really tell the story behind each of those specimens with someone who paid that much attention to him Raphael didn’t even blink... He never thought he said he had a company in his life that interested in that.

His heart was pounding and racing, his cheeks were red like some of those petals and he wouldn’t stop talking for a moment, only to hear the other's questions and to answer them with equal happiness and enthusiasm.

Without realizing, he approached the Archangel more and more until his legs were touching, his arms were close and his hands rubbed from time to time. Too much touching for angelic standards. He acted naturally but was evidently happy and radiant with that conversation that didn’t even notice their resting time going by while they spent it together ...

Raphael was too immersed in the world of the Principality's fantastic descriptions and drawings to be bothered about time or anything surrounding them. As he watched attentively, going back and forth on the pages and thanking God for having found someone so capable of doing the job for which he wanted a helper for so long.

Suddenly he closed the book, particularly interested in the subject too much to notice that the Angel was approaching in a way that wasn’t simply innocent or acceptable. In fact, the rest time had run out.

"I think you will be the perfect one to register Creation with me. You have a unique talent to perceive details and capture beauty, in a way that I wouldn’t be able to. If you wish, go and ask Her for permission. I’ll wait for your answer." He handed the catalog to the owner and stood up. "It's been a lot of fun being your friend, Angel. See you!"

And he went away still sleepy, as he hadn’t rested properly, but nevertheless that day Rapahel did something much better than that: _a friend._

Aziraphale noticed that he would close the book suddenly and tensed himself by going back a moment giving a certain distance from the Archangel. Perhaps he had gone too far. He was about to apologize when he heard the other's words.

His bright blue eyes were teary and his being was filled with a joy he never felt before. He was proud of his skills not feeling he was just a chubby, clumsy Angel without friends as he always was.

He bit his lip a bit nervous with so many compliments on him at once. Raphael was just too spontaneous he couldn't believe it was really happening to him. He nodded "Thank you, Raphael, I will speak to Her immediately, I promise you will not be disappointed, dear." He said confident in himself. His heart was in his throat of so much emotion!

Aziraphale was unable to respond to the Archangel when he stood up, giving only a shy wave in response and smiling shyly. He would apologize for his boldness and for not letting him rest ... But all he could think about was the fact that he had finally achieved a sincere friendship and found someone who really admired his work.

He hugged his book, sighing deeply, still leaning against the tree, smiling like a fool as he watched Raphael disappear in the distance ... wondering when he would see him again.

_But now he had a more urgent mission, make his request to the Almighty as soon as possible._


	3. Description

Raphael hadn’t seen time go by, immersed in work, he almost forgot what Aziraphale had promised. When the stars began to spatter the sky, he stretched his body on the comfortable grass, with his fire like hair spread over it, creating the perfect contrast.

The Archangel didn't know if it was wrong to contemplate his own deeds and be proud of them, anyway, he had never been alone. She had inspired him every second oh his creation.

Raphael looked aside recognizing a flower that the Principality had shown him and smiled remembering what had happened. Had he succeeded in his conversation with Her? He hadn't seen Aziraphale anymore…

Aziraphale after that meeting immediately went to see the Almighty to ask fervently to accompany his new friend in his work with the firmament. She, already knowing the real feelings of the Angel but also being aware of how things should happen, granted permission to the Principality who was in pure bliss, excited to tell his friend.

After searching the previous resting place, not finding the Archangel, he began to search incessantly for Raphael. It was already getting dark so maybe he could join him already in his work at that moment? Oh, it made him euphoric!

Nearby he found that red hair lying on the grass and sighed when he knew that there was his friend, the guy who made his heart beat faster.

Aziraphale approached with the biggest smile across his face. He was about to call out the name of the other when he noticed him touching a flower, the work of Her creation. That was just heartwarming ... It made him bite his lip and his eyes water. Raphael really liked his job ...

He took a few slower, timid steps approaching. "Hello ..." He almost whispered, kneeling beside him. "I was looking for you, dear." He smiled more sweetly looking at the yellow flower beside the Archangel.

"I have news I would like to share with you." He looked at Raphael again and almost lost his breath for an instant, his face shone reflecting the starlight, contrasted with the red of his hair and the emerald green of the grass, it was breathtaking. Again his face was flushed and he turned his eyes to the flower, ashamed.

Raphael wouldn’t have the courage to take the flower away. It was too beautiful to be pulled out and die. What was the use of something beautiful, if it couldn't stay alive and be seen by other people and remain forever?

It was when he noticed, by stepping on the grass, that someone was approaching. He rolled his eyes and sat down in an almost premonitory reflection. "Were you? Did I disappear without realizing it?" He spoke, scratching his own head.

"Well, tell me everything. What did She say? That's it about, isn't it?" He watched the Angel and how he looked full of emotions that he couldn't contain. Joy, maybe? Excitement? He thought the other would never really tell him. And as always, the sudden blushes across his face that intrigued the Archangel. "Is everything okay? You look more vibrant now, but also I don’t know..." Uncomfortable maybe?

Aziraphale just laughed at him just a little nervous "Of course you didn't disappear ... I just looked for you under that tree and I didn't find you..." he said simply, already having that little place as a meeting point for them both.

He saw the other one sit down and sighed with relief, they were closer but for some reason he felt better and more welcomed in that way to talk about it. The Principality looked at him still with a rosy face but now feeling better "She allowed me to join you in you work." He said satisfied hoping that the Archangel would be as happy as himself.

"Oh I'm fine, I just walked a lot until I found you ..." he lied about his slightly too rosy face, but as he was chubby it was a good excuse to be red and panting. "I'm glad She agreed ... I ..." he swallowed hard.

"I'm glad I can be your helper." He confessed subtly blushing looking down at the flower, awkwardly. He didn't even know where to put his hands that were now slightly shaking with anticipation and happiness.

He couldn't wait to start drawing those beautiful constellations, a Principality, someone who never imagined he could be someone’s helper... He had ideas for new paints, sparkles, designs ... To do a job worthy for the Archangel to consult later and be proud of and to show others.

"Ah, it's true, sometimes I change places ... but there aren't too many places, are there?" Raphael suddenly recalled that Aziraphale had mentioned a special place for him and was curious about where it was. And why it was special.

"Really?" Raphael was truly happy and excited and, without thinking, he approached and embraced the Angel in pure joy. "I'm so happy you're coming with me!" Then he remembered the Principality saying he wasn’t used to physical contact and went back. "Ah, I'm sorry ... I did it again ...".

He sat there, but at a distance that was considered safe. "I can see ... So that's why you're flushed, Angel. What kinds of things did you tell to make Her agree?" He asked with a laugh and wondered how much he should have said. "I want you to show me flowers of all kinds."

Aziraphale simply agreed, there weren't many places. But the fact was that he didn't want to lose sight of the Archangel at all. But he wouldn't say that out loud to massage the other's ego that much.

Aziraphale for a moment was breathless and had no reaction when he was hugged all of a sudden. He didn’t imagine that the Archangel was so physical. He only managed to release his breath when he heard his voice again. He returned the embrace with affection for the seconds that remained of it. "Y-you don't need to apologize, I-I liked it...." he said, turning red again. If he could, he would live into that embrace.

He chuckled after hearing the other request from the Archangel "I ... I just said it was your invitation for me to help you with your work after you saw my art drawing flowers ...." he smiled more sweetly and less ashamed of his work as a designer.

“And that it would be an honor and maybe a great idea to highlight the beauty of Her humble servants add my skill to illustrate Her creations ... " he said looking back at the flower ...

For Aziraphale his drawings weren’t as beautiful as the incredible and brilliant constellations created by the other talented one, but if Raphael saw beauty in them, for Azi it was already worth it. " I am sure that I will enjoy every and each moment by your side." He returned his attention to the Archangel looking him directly in the eyes.

His look was the sweetest, kindest of all, exuding real happiness. His hand, to point out that physical contact was all right, ended up on top of the other's hand, caressing it lightly. A slightly daring move, but one that Aziraphale wanted to see how Raphael would react.

"Ah, okay ... I feel more comfortable like that." Then Raphael seemed to think for a moment, as if he were emptying his head, looking in another direction. "Wait, did you really like this idea?" He asked smiling, as if only now he understood that it wasn't just something that didn't bother him, but it was as well a good thing.

"Hmm ... I see. And what kind of response did She give?" He asked curiously, wanting to know why She apparently agreed so easily. Maybe Aziraphale could convince him better, with his cute way and innocent expression.

"You put it into words much better than I would ever do! That's why you are the one who is going to describe the beauties you find out there. You already do it very well."

Oh, Raphael didn’t expect any of the kind of behavior that Aziraphale was about to have with him. And if he said he understood the meaning, he would be lying. Although very intelligent, he was also as silly as Angels used to be. Soon he would notice that the Principality treated him differently than the other Angels, but for now he was just the naive Raphael.

He didn’t try to escape the Angel's gaze, but neither did he attribute any specific meaning to it. And when the other gently touched his hand, he smiled, naturally leaning towards his friend and covering it with his free hand.

"We really are friends, aren't we, Angel?"

"Yes, I did ..." Aziraphale said, still stroking his hand. He turned very red and looked down with all those compliments, "Don't be silly, dear Raphael, you are an Archangel, surely She would accept your will much more easily than mine ...." he was of a lower caste, maybe he had to convince Her better. He bit his lip, feeling the chill in his belly again and that mixture of sensations that he couldn't distinguish.

"She said that I can remain working with you as long as you want me to. As long as I continue to catalog the flowers that were my initial mission ... Otherwise, I shouldn't bother you with my presence...." soon his smile faded "And ... when you finish I should go to my real obligation as Principality ... and you will be assigned to yours .... " he said in a voice that oozed sorrow.

Eventually they would be separated and his heart would be broken. However, for now Aziraphale wouldn't think about it. Without thinking, he caressed the Archangel's soft hand and I tried to ward off his silly fears.

He felt that hand over his and in the reflection he took it. It was a silent signal that he didn’t want them to be separate even after they had completed their tasks together ... They could take time to rest or meet somewhere without anyone knowing ... What Aziraphale didn’t want was to lose contact with his Beloved Archangel. But he couldn't say that. So ... he just stick to the warmth of those hands.

"I liked it too. You are soft and cuddly. Good to hug." One thing you never knew was if Raphael was simply being sincere, saying exactly what he meant or if something had momentarily crossed his mind and he wanted to play with his Angel. "Who knows, but what matters is that She agreed, don't you think?"

"Well, then it will certainly take a while, since the sky is far from being filled with stars and each of them doesn’t take just a day to be done ... Sometimes it takes up to seven. On the last one I rest." He raised an eyebrow.

"So just flowers? Or as long as you don't forget them?" He realized that the other already showed some previous sadness at being separated from him. "Oh, don't worry, my Angel. I'm sure we will always meet, we will find a way I promise" he said with more sweetness than usual.

He stood there holding his hand for a while, until he felt Aziraphale was less sad. So he finally changed the subject. "So, what do we do? Do you want to start soon or ..." _‘Or what, Raphael? Look at what's going on in your_ head’ ... He warned himself.

Aziraphale couldn't help but laugh at the compliment. He didn't like that fact .... He wanted to be thin and slim like all the other Angels ... But if Raphael liked it ... Then he didn't mind "You can hug me whenever you want ... I promise." He played with him back. He agreed with a smile. Aziraphale was immensely happy that She agreed .... If She didn’t, he would be content with these meetings between one job and another to rest together.

The Angel's eyes widened. 7 days for one star only? That meant a lot of time with Raphael. It felt like a dream! He was immensely happy now. His huge smile with pink cheeks denounced that.

"As long as I don't forget them ... She told me to pay full attention to your stars, since you have already created some constellations, didn’t you? I have to catalog them too ..."

He bit his lip, thinking of always meeting, and his hand tightened on his. Raphael didn't know how much he wanted that. Now that he tasted the other's company, he didn't want to lose it anymore.

He stayed for a few moments just looking at the Archangel's eyes, his face studded with diamonds in front of him admiring it. "I don't know .... You were lying here ... I don't know if you were going to rest .... I don't want to disturb you ..." he said awkwardly.

Of course he wanted to start soon, but he would do what the Archangel said. After all, he worked for him now, and he wanted to do was his best. Besides he would be happy by obeying him, Aziraphale was taught obeying Angels of higher castes.

"Soon I’ll be using you as a pillow. It seems very comfortable." Funny as Raphael was, it wasn’t an exaggeration what he said. Not that he wanted to imply anything derogatory to that kind of comment.

"Yes indeed I already created some. But you must know them, after all, is rare someone who doesn’t look up to the sky from time to time." And from time to time could mean quite a long time specially for Aziraphale.

"Nah, I was going to rest. Probably at some point I will. I already tried hard today and probably wouldn't do a good job forcing myself more. So I don't know ... you can meet me early tomorrow to start ... Which doesn't mean that I'm kicking you out. " He was going to add something, but he didn't want to make his situation even worse, like, 'The grass is soft' Wow, Raphael had invented cheap flirting without realizing it.

Aziraphale frowned slightly at the comment but let it pass. Maybe being a pillow wouldn't be that bad. But he wanted the only one to be used as a pillow by Raphael, no one else. He was creating jealousy without realizing it.

He nodded. Yes, he knew it very well. The Principality knew when there was a new bright spot in the sky, he kept watching every change that Raphael made ... He looked up in reflection. It was getting dark enough for the first silvery spots to appear.

"Early tomorrow, then, it will be," He almost said a ‘Yes sir.’ at the end of the sentence. But he couldn’t wait for the first day working alongside his beloved and talented Archangel. It felt like a dream coming true. He would take his best paint brushes and paraphernalia to make real works of art of his creation.

"I know you're not kicking me out ..." he decided to dare more by letting go of his hand and getting closer to the Archangel. "I really like your company." He confessed, flushing "Could I spend some more time here with you? You could show me your stars or I don't know ..." pointed to his lap going to lay down.

"You can use me as your pillow if you want, please tell me if I am soft to your liking, oh Archangel." and laughed softly. It was the perfect opportunity to run his fingers through that soft hair that he always wanted and just stand there hand in hand listening to the other brag about his art.

Well, a pillow was something the Archangel really liked, so there was no problem.

Perhaps Raphael didn’t know that Aziraphale knew the stars that well, even from afar, just as he knew some flowers himself. Everyone has secrets, right? And their secrets just matched.

"Fine for me." It was deal. He smiled like a thief about to steal something from someone, but he didn't know what he was really taking from his Angel.

"Ah ... O-of course. I thought about asking, but ..." He felt the other closer and this time he was the one embarrassed feeling worse with each bolder phrase coming of an Angel so cute and ... innocent?

"Of course I could. It would be my pleasure!" He accepted the invitation, lying down slowly, but unable to avoid 'fluffing' the other out of pure habit.

"It's soft enough. But I'm sure that when you laugh it gets funnier, literally." He took a deep breath. "Stars right?" He said targeting each other briefly the position it was in, just to know what kind of look he had at that time.

The only thing Raphael had ever stolen entirely from the Angel was his heart. It was totally his, and that smile… oh dear God ... He felt himself melting right there before him. Hearing the Archangel stuttering made him almost proud of himself ... Did he really manage to make the other one awkward huh? How wonderful. It just proved that game he knew how to play too.

Aziraphale couldn’t help but give a lovely giggle before feeling the weight of Raphael's head on his body. Now he knew it wasn't just a dream. It was really happening. He looked down and sighed more passionately than he should have, making it clear what he felt when he looked into the Archangel's eyes.

"Yes, stars, those that carry the same glow as your face, Raphael ...." He raised his hand and caressed his cheek slowly, with his fingertips tangling the red strands slowly as if asking for permission to do so. They were so soft.

"I ... I used to watch the stars alone ... I must say that with your company it is much more ... Interesting ..." he said softly now looking at the sky but still caressing his face and hair carefully. "Thank you for staying here with me ...." he said softly.

Raphael had lost his usual facade in the face of Aziraphale's advances. Something was going on and he was a little intimidated. he had never had that particular feeling before so he barely knew how to differentiate it.

It wasn’t anxiety or anything negative. Perhaps a little like receiving a new, very challenging task. It was a little "scary". It wasn’t at all negative, it was dubious and this made the Archangel even more confused.

However, a part of him let himself go by the usual way, carefree, innocent, without judging intentions on others. "Thank you. They never put it that way. I always thought it was a little strange. It looks like I have fragments of pebbles stuck to my face."

"So you should already know a lot of things about them. It isn’t so difficult to learn alone ... But up there, everything is different." He spoke a little more seriously. "You're welcome, Angel..." He said with a smile returning to normal.

Aziraphale laughed. "Strange? It depends on who sees ... They also find it strange that an Angel is chubby ... Or with hair as white as mine ... Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder ..." He said without paying much attention just caressing the other and looking at the stars imagining the face of his loved one. All the Angels and Archangels had some peculiarity in their bodies, Raphael had that ... And of all the adjectives that he could think of, strange wasn’t one of them.

"Different how, Raphael ...?" He asked in a whisper noting that the fragments of pebbles really had some volume on his face were all in high relief, nice to caress. Being called Angel again warmed his heart, and he just moved to stand on his side, closer to the Archangel but not taking his eyes off the sky.

"Tell me everything about your job ... I want to know more, please ..." He asked innocently with a racing heart. The smell of his lover's hair was intoxicating, and having it so close was an indescribable happiness. He wondered silently if Raphael felt the same way.

"I don't think so. There's no reason for everyone to be the same, is there? No one has defined what is more acceptable or not around here. Not yet, maybe ..." Raphael thought distantly, so much that he lost a bit of what he thought for a few moments.

"Well, for a start, it's scary. A huge, dark void. The impression that you can get lost and never find your way back is silly, but it is always there. There's nothing under you and practically nothing to look around. No reference points. The stars are actually very distant from each other and there is a lot, a lot of empty space between any celestial body and another. Furthermore, stars are not all there is ... if they were just them, what is the meaning to exist, but I think you understand." He paused a little. "Am I talking too much?" He looked at the other, who looked very happy, and smiled.

Aziraphale just smiled and flushed for a few moments, that seemed like a disguised compliment from the other. At least he was sure that now Raphael didn't think he was as strange as most Angels did. His affection only intensified as if silently thanking him. Knowing he was accepted was a big deal coming from Raphael.

Aziraphale listened and the more he looked at the immensity of the infinite over the two, the more he was scared. His hand instinctively reached for Raphael's and grabbed it. He didn't want to feel that he was going to lose his way home when he joined the Archangel in his work and they weren't even in space yet. It looked like there would be just the two of them as ... Two stars, just two missing dots, and he didn't want to get lost from his reference red dot.

"Not at all, my dear ..." He said looking at the other's smile and immediately calming down and feeling free to use that pet name with Raphael. "I was just thinking too much ... My ... Work is nothing that exciting ..." the grip on his hand lessened but remained there. He wanted to ask the other not to let him go when they were there, but ... It was a bit much. He seemed like a scared child.

Would the Archangel find what he did tedious and boring? Or that he was not good enough to draw his constellations? Capture their true brilliance? It made him nervous for a while ... Not being enough ... He swallowed and tried not to think about it.

"For a person who wasn’t used to physical contact, you are quite affable, Aziraphale." Raphael commented with a laugh.

"Calm down ... we will not get lost. There is always this place to go back, right? With time you’ll get used to it. I was scared my first time too." He spoke, feeling the other shake his hand as if his description of the space had really made an impact. However, nothing made more of an impact than actually being there. He wouldn't say any of that, so as not to scare the Angel any further, but the loneliness and silence of space could really be maddening.

"Let's start little by little ... everything will be fine." Then he turned to the other with a pitying look. "Angel, in addition to drawing, do you know how to describe, with beautiful words? I mean ... you couldn’t only transform what you see into paintings, but narrate Creation. If you can, of course ..." Without knowing Aziraphale's insecurity , Raphael added even more fuel to the fire. But how to resist green and mischievous eyes, wanting to return his Angel's provocations in kind.

"The fact that I am not used to physical contact .... It doesn't mean that I don't know how to receive it from someone I trust ..." Aziraphale said simply when he was called affable. "You, on the other hand, seem quite used to it ..." he said about the physical contact since Raphael didn’t stiffen no matter how much Aziraphale touched and approuched him.

"Yeah. We can always go back home." He said a little more calmly. Actually, he didn't want to go home if it meant to be away from the other. However, he couldn't say it out loud. The Principality believed when the other said it would be okay. He had no reason not to take the word of an Archangel. Now the affection on his hand, it was no longer a squeeze ... It was, gentle, sweet. Just like Aziraphale.

"Narrate?" His heart missed a beat. "I ... Er ..." He started to turn red and to be confused with the words "Raphael ... I could never with my limited adjectives and poor writing describe the real beauty of Her creation ..." he didn't think he could do that. He bit his lip nervously and his hand tightened his grip on the other's.

Raphael was really massaging his ego to unimaginable sizes ... It made him awkward but full of himself. It was a very delicious yet dubious sensation. It provoked feeling that Aziraphale had never felt before.

He swallowed and moistened his suddenly dry lips. "I can try to describe something else for you to see if I am ready to describe your work ... You tell me if it’s good enough for you since you saw my catalog before you hired me for the work.... "he looked directly into his eyes with evident expectation.

"Hmm ... I never imagined that mistrust was common among Angels. Yes, I'm used to it because I don't believe anyone can do me any harm. What else could happen?" Raphael asked rhetorically, shrugging and letting go as he rolled his eyes.

"Yes ... I mean describing an event in motion, so it's an action, a narration, isn't it? Hmm ... I thought something like, 'and then there was light' ... some simple clichés, but ... " It was taking the eyes and the smile of the other and turning around. "You just do what you want."

"Hmm ... it's a good idea. But what would it be then?" He looked at the other again, seeing that he would probably get what he wanted.

Aziraphale couldn't help but give a louder laugh, Raphael was really interesting. He was delighted by that aspect of him. "Really ... nothing ..." Aziraphale said more sadly looking at another direction. If by any chance with his clumsiness he hurt someone or even Raphael with his flaming sword ... It wouldn't be with intention but it could happen, wouldn't it? Oh he would blame himself forever.

"I-I want, of course I do ... Wouldn't you like it?" The Principality immediately returned to Raphael as if he didn't want to lose the other's attention. He instigated him in a way that was mesmerizing.

He continued looking directly at the Archangel "Something that I really like... That I cherish and have observed for a long time ... That I believe I will be able to make a good narration / description the way you want, my dear…" he said, approaching a little more and looking at him with more affection, his hand going to his face studded with little sparkles. Aziraphale didn't explain what it was just to make the other curious ... Would Raphael accept his proposal to be surprised?

"Why are you laughing? Aren't we supposed to trust each other, as we are all said to be perfect creations of the Almighty, what could happen if it wasn't allowed by Her or was in Her plans?" It was a difficult argument to counter. Besides, it was usually used _ad nauseam_ by other Archangels as a justification for any behavior. Like it or not, Raphael still clung to that teaching as a way to avoid seeing ‘darker colors’ in certain Angels or even in his own attitudes.

"Do you? Do you really want to?" He smiled inwardly, amused by the state of nerves he had caused in Aziraphale. As much as Heaven was a Manichaean place, there was malice and even a certain sadism in Raphael when he played with his Angel, already knowing his weaknesses. And being an Archangel, that was definitely a BAD sign.

"Well, go ahead ..." However it was a good sign that Raphael had no idea what Aziraphale was going to describe, when it was pretty obvious already. He just watched the other as it seemed that he was getting closer and closer and his face started to take on a light pink color on his cheeks.

"It is supposed to, of course. But to what extent do we trust?" Aziraphale looked at him more seriously. At that moment the two were "over trusting" each other, could he say, with all the touches and physical intimacies they were developing, something that shouldn't be happening, right? If they got too involved with these so-called ‘trusts’ they could get into serious trouble.

"Always trust blindly? In any of ours?" He spoke while playing with one of his curls. Raphael had a point, everything was allowed by Her and was in Her Divine and perfect plans .... So even their approach was as well. Nothing to worry about right?

" _A lot._ " guaranteed the Angel looking at the other with begging eyes and even pure devotion to the Archangel. Raphael had only to ask or challenge him, that Aziraphale would gladly accept ... or at least try. For him even to fail was worth it if it was for Raphael. He wanted to surprise him or at least be useful.

He opened the biggest and most sincere of smiles "I will." He assured him "Be here at the same time tomorrow and I will have your description in hand, Raphael." He assured Raphael still close to his face, his breaths mixing. God, how beautiful he was.

The Angel was quickly trying to memorize every detail of his face at that moment, almost without blinking. That brief moment passed, he simply came over and kissed his cheek with affection, a light brush of lips, returning immediately to the initial position and facing him again.


	4. Grass

"Has anyone ever done you any harm, Aziraphale?" Raphael asked quickly and without thinking. He could have put it another way like, 'Do you fear that someone will ever harm you?' or 'Do you have bad intentions against any other Angel?' But it was all derived from the question he had asked. It was enough to make a game of inversions.

He smiled even more. "I would love to be able to take on that extra task, as long as it doesn't overwhelm you."

"Tomorrow? I thought we were going to work ... Do you want to postpone until you're sure you can do the job? And ... why are you so close? Is there something in my face?" He saw how the Angel stared at him, almost mesmerized and at the same time analytical, but without saying anything.

Then he felt the kiss and had two opposite reactions, one of contentment, a chill in his spine, but which he could only consider pleasant and the other a surprise. The Archangel was startled for a moment and then relaxed, thinking that that Principality was really unpredictable, while smiling. He had already seen kisses between Angels around, so he didn't understand why he felt that way, but as it was a normal thing… No problem a simple kiss.

Aziraphale went pale for a moment "No ... No one ever did me any harm..." He said, swallowing hard. However, he knew that the thoughts he had about what he wanted to do with Raphael weren’t evil, but ... They were certainly viewed as a bad thing by his superiors, he was sure of that.

All those sensations that he felt ... That didn't seem like anything heavenly. "I am afraid that someday I will harm someone, even not on purpose..." He said a little more quietly, not wanting to dwell on that subject, looking for a spot on the floor to distract himself from his dark thoughts.

Aziraphale wasn’t afraid for himself, he was for others, always others putting others above himself, it was always like that. He never cared much about himself or what could happen to him ... But if something bad happened to other beings because of him ... God he didn't even want to think about that possibility.

"What about you? Has anyone ever hurt you, Raphael?" he asked back, thinking that he could be so bold as to ask a question like that to an Angel of higher caste.

"It won’t overwhelm me ... I think that just being with the flowers would be tedious ..." Raphael said it took how long to make a single star? One week? He would really have a lot of time to dedicate himself to the job ....

"I also thought we were going to work" He said laughing "But you challenged me to something new ... How can I focus on that if you want me to join you on your work?" He said mischievously playing with the other and not distancing himself in the slightest.

"I'm the one asking you ... Can _you_ postpone _your_ work? If you can't, I'll understand ..." he said looking at him ... "There's nothing on your face dear ..." His voice was almost a whisper "Your beauty is something that I have never seen before... Just that it is difficult not to be enchanted ... " he saw the mixed feelings of the other in that kiss and just smiled. No one seemed negative. What he himself felt was also far from negative.

He just raised his hand and stroked his face silently, still with a silly smile across his face hoping that the other wouldn’t run away.

"Why would you do that, Angel?" Raphael said with a smile. "You don't have anyone's hard feelings, do you?" He asked, surrounding the subject on which Aziraphale really focused. He would never imagine that the other thought he could harm himself.

"No, they never hurt me. And I believe I didn't hurt anyone, either. If I did, it honestly must have been completely unintentional. I don't have anyone's hard feelings either, or any reason to harm someone else. I hope otherwise be true." The Archangel explained quickly.

"Hmm ... we can postpone the job, Aziraphale. One day it's not really a big problem. Or if you want we can work after you make your description." Although they were friends, wouldn't it be strange that they met one more night just for the Angel to show his work, right? What would they do next?

"Oh ... thank you…" He said turning red and trying to look away from the other. Oh that naughty Angel. "Well, what are we going to do? Keep counting stars?"

"I didn't have time to relate to someone enough to develop anyone's hard feelings, dear." Aziraphale simply said. Really, none of the people he knew had enough time along with him for stronger feelings ... Not even friendship ... It was all very fast and fleeting.

"I understand ..." He said to him with a weak smile. It was really a silly fear of his that was being thrown out, Aziraphale couldn’t understand why he was assigned to be a Principality, who’s duty was to protect something important, that eventually meant hurting someone, something that he didn’t want ... That he just couldn’t do. It seemed wrong and that he didn't fit the role, but She didn't make mistakes in Her choices, did She?

"If I am not going to disturb you, then yes, we will be late one day ... She won’t be angry, I guarantee ..." He said with a more sincere smile, really excited and happy to show Raphael his work. The Principality really thought he could do a good job and maybe even surprise him. If he didn't win Raphael with his description, he might even give up working with him.

"Do you feel rested already?" he laughed softly "In your free time, what do you do besides napping on the grass, Raphael? ..." He said putting a strand of his hair behind his ear "Forgive me, but I can't help it, your hair is so soft..." Aziraphale saw him get the same color as it and laughed even more.

He thought of many things to be done as a pair in the time they would be there but ... Everything seemed too bold and wrong to speak out loud ... He would rather hear from Raphael what to do, after all now he worked for him. That kiss on the cheek didn’t leave his mind "Counting stars doesn't seem like a bad idea ..." Actually doing anything in the other's company didn't seem like a bad idea actually.

"Hm, I suppose I haven't been around for a long time… But never mind, that's my nonsense. Always wanting to understand things a little more than it should, I think. " Raphael spoke absentmindedly.

"No, I'm sure not. Time is endless ... that's what I heard," he said, returning the smile as if to reassure the other. Nothing was going to happen as long as they didn't lie on the grass forever.

"No, I’m not talking about today, but about tomorrow, for the night ..." He explained. "Oh, you got me there. You don't really have that much to do, do you? But I talk to other Angels. Some have very interesting ideas. And I try to observe everything that happens around me, so that I have creativity to do what I have to… I even have my very own sketches. Nothing elegant like your paintings. They are more diagrams of ideas that I have ... And of course, I have a place to sleep, which is not here on the grass…” he chuckled softly.

Aziraphale just stared at him while Raphael explained his point of view. He didn't understand much why he was getting so much into the merit of hurt and hurting himself ... He knew he was safe by the side of his beloved Archangel, that he had nothing to fear .... However, he decided for good not to get into the subject more, not to ruin the good time they were sharing.

"Yes ..." it was endless how much time they could spend together if they wanted to. That was most interesting thing from the Angel's perspective. As immortal creatures, it was a matter of choice no matter what they were doing.

"Do you have many friends here?" The Principality imagined that many knew him, as well as himself. He had never spoken to the Archangel directly but he knew him by sight. The color of his curls were unmistakable. Aziraphale had already seen Raphael talking to other people, but he had never had the courage to approach ... would he ever hear his ideas?

"Drafts?" Aziraphale said with the brightest blue eyes "Why didn't you mention that before? I would love to see them!" Oh something to have as a model! It seemed incredible to have another type of art from his 'muse' to admire beyond the stars and the beauty of he himself.

Aziraphale laughed a little "Of course I know you don’t sleep here on the grass ... And I imagine you are the observer type ..." He looked at him with more affection. He couldn't imagine anything much different from that for someone with the creativity to create constellations. The Principality didn't create flowers, he just copied them ... He would never be able to do that.

"Could you show me one day?" He asked more gently, taking his hand again. He didn't care about being watched ... Aziraphale wasn’t the type to talk a lot and having the opportunity to open up to someone and be heard was great for himself.

Raphael noticed that the other was suddenly silent, but he didn't comment on anything either. Sometimes we get lost in thoughts that are our own. It was what he sincerely believed.

"I have a few. A little group you could say. We don't really have that much affinity. As we have. You are my friend ..." He spoke with a certain confidence in his words, although he knew the other very little. Perhaps that was how he chose his friends, based more on an immediate affinity than on a deep reflection on the character of his friendships.

"Ah ... My drawings, there is nothing interesting. They are somewhat incomprehensible doodles where I place the position of one star in relation to the other. They are not at all cute..." He laughed.

"Yes, I have a little corner to rest and that's where I draw... But I don't stay long there. It's a dull place. It shouldn't be nice like your secret place, I imagine. Well ... I think I can show you. You'll see it someday." He spoke with a little hopefull smile.

Aziraphale smiled at being called a friend. He wanted a lot to be more than a friend ... And also wondered if his other friends did the things he was doing with Raphael ... But he wasn't going to ask that now. Those were intimacies that he didn’t have the right to know with such a short time of friendship. However, he was sure of one thing ... Raphael easily won over everyone around him ... He had his charm, beauty and sympathy.

"You are my first friend." Aziraphale wouldn’t say the only one not to be sad, but it was the truth. He didn't want to be just one more in his group. He wanted to be special, even if it was just as a helper.

"But I still want to see them." He made a cute pout and crossed his arms pretending a tantrum. Were his drawings cute? Wasn't it enough for him to be a cutie himself?

"I can show you my place tomorrow along with my description." He said with a small smile, quickly changing his face "What do you think? Would you like to go there with me?" This would later be called a 'date' in the language of humans later on, but now it was just an invitation.

"Oh, that must be important. Being someone's first friend. It's such an honor." Raphael spoke, not wishing to diminish the mood of the other in any way. There is always a first friend, isn't it? What was wrong with him being that friend? "Okay, I'll let you see my drafts..." He stopped being stubborn.

"Would you really show me? Isn't it a special place? I thought it was just yours ..." Something inside the Archangel shifted a little. As if that was something really unique. It was an invitation that seemed Aziraphale wanted to share a piece of something that was only his, with him. Like a secret.

Aziraphale just smiled more sweetly. The fact that the other just saw the positive side of things made him more excited. "Yes, honor all mine." He didn't mind not being his first friend, however.

"Ah, you are special too." He said laughing and giving him a light punch on the shoulder just for fun. Wasn't it an honor to be the first friend? "Are you going to be the first to see my place too, it isn’t funny not having anyone to share with…" he would be the first to see his drafts ... Many times first times already.

"Please accept." He said approaching the Archangel and placing both hands over his "It would mean a lot to me" Aziraphale looked in his eyes expectantly. Raphael was the only person he would like to take there.

Raphael smiled at what he said but said nothing. They were building a friendship little by little. Even if they had an affinity, it could take a while before they became really intimate.

"Me, but why?" He looked at the other without really understanding what he meant, with an air of confusion in the way he was looking at himself. "Hmm, sometimes we have a place that no one needs to know. Which is like a secret from ourselves. A place where we know we won't be ever disturbed..." But despite his tour of special and private places, he understood what that meant for Aziraphale, showing that place to a new friend meant a lot, so he agreed. "Okay... Tomorrow ..." And smiled.

"For being my first friend, even if it is to have chosen me as an assistant ..." Yes, even that was special for Aziraphale. Someone who saw more in him than being a fat and awkward Angel wielding a flaming sword ... Who gave him a chance to speak and express himself, who listened when most ignored him. That was special with no doubt and Raphael might never have known how much difference he made in the life of that Angel.

"It's agreed." Aziraphale just couldn't wait for all this. He didn’t know how he was going to endure anxiety and excitement for everything that was happening to him. At that, he lifted the Archangel's hand and kissed the back as if to seal the promise.

"I think it's a good enough reason. Thanks for the invitation. I'm going to see a place that no one else has seen, hehe." Raphael celebrated jokingly. He imagined that Aziraphale's special place should also have special things, like flowers and ... the Angel himself. Ah, but there he goes again thinking too much, Raphael! Control yourself.

"You are so kind to me, Angel ... Is that how you really are?" By then, curiosity was already part of him and he found himself wondering if Aziraphale was like that with everyone, or if there was something about their relationship that was different.

Aziraphale for a moment lost his smile "I ..." he bit his lip "I don't have anyone else to be kind with." In the reflection, he took his hands from his and placed them nervously on his lap "If you don't like it I can stop ..." he said in a small voice.

Aziraphale didn’t know that he could be affectionate like that, in fact Raphael was the first creature that let him get this far and close so he didn’t go away or mistreated him as the others did.

The Principality was approaching and increasing the touches and caresses as he felt more secure and certain that the Archangel liked that ... But how to explain to him that he was discovering his way with another being only now? Raphael would sure laugh at how pathetic he was.

His eyes stung for an instant and he looked down to disguise it. "You treated me differently from everyone else ..." he confessed softly "I like to treat you with affection." that Angel wasn’t just daring. He had feelings too ... that were hurt long time ago.

He played with his fingers seeming anxious, he was almost in a crisis when he thought about it all, but he didn't let it show. Aziraphale swallowed hard, trying to ignore his feelings blooming inside him. Of course, their relationship was different ... Aziraphale just had no parameters for not having friends ...

"No ... okay ... I didn't mean that ..." Raphael looked at the other, a little lost. "... it was bad," was all he managed to say in the face of the strange situation that quickly formed with his very spontaneous comment. Then he heard the other speak and understood the Angel should feel alone there and without a very good sense of how to relate to his fellow.

"It's okay, Aziraphale." He said touching his arm reassuringly. "You didn't do anything wrong and I'm not bothered by it. We are friends, right? There is nothing wrong with giving a little affection to a friend." He finished with a smile, pulling his hand back. "Can I?"

Aziraphale opened the biggest smile again, having his hand pulled back and being reassured that way. It was all he needed to feel appreciated again. He took the Archangel's hand with affection and pulled him close.

"I'm not the one to give a little affection, I'll tell you right away." he said laughing as he approached Raphael.

The Principality came even closer and slowly rested his head on the Archangel's shoulder, pretending he would look at the stars propped on the other, now they were really looking like a couple.

"Can I?" He said simply not avoiding affection and being close to each other anymore. Now he grabbed his hand and a piece of his arm. Being close to those smelling red curls was intoxicating ... seeing the stars that way ... It was heaven, literally.

"Okay ... I don't think I'll bother ..." The Archangel spoke in a more relaxed way without seeming to see what he was saying as a problem or a threat.

He waited for the other to settle and laughed. "Well, you're already here, aren't you?" Raphael felt a mixture of comfort and calm, with a slight nervousness. However, it was a good kind of nervousness, much like expectation. He tried to breathe slowly so that the other wouldn’t notice. "Anyway, do you want me to keep talking about stars?" He spoke while trying to divert his attention a little.

"Please ..." Aziraphale practically whispered, leaning further on the other's shoulder ... "Besides your hair I also like your voice" he really needed to learn to be quiet before he spoke too much.

He began to caress the Archangel's hand in gentle movements and sigh from time to time. The Principality was deeply happy ... and couldn't help but make that evident. This was without a doubt the best place in the world for himself.

"Then maybe I'll spend some time talking about flowers ..." he laughed softly, suggesting to the other. He was sure he would learn a lot in his new job. Maybe exchange some knowledge.

"You’re making me uncomfortable here, Angel ..." Raphael laughed a little nervously and blushed under all those sparkles on his face.

The truth is that he was happy too, but he didn't quite understand where that feeling came from. It was starting to get colder and being close to each other made everything cozier.

"Yes, of course, who knows tomorrow ... since we are going to meet. Why don't you tell me about flowers?" Then he raised an arm so he could point to the sky as if willing to return to the main subject.

"Well ... right there is the constellation of...”

_It was the beginning of the first great excuse to lie together on the grass. After all, there weren’t few stars in the sky._


	5. Description

On the night of the following day, after having had a quiet day of rest, Raphael waited for his friend at the agreed place, while the night hadn’t yet arrived and stayed observing the place, where few Angels gathered at that time, as if watching the day turn to night, something that still didn’t make much sense to the Archangel, ironically, even though he was responsible for creating celestial bodies.

The reader could now ask if Heaven had its own sun or planetary system so that it would be there day and night or if everything was just a mirage to make the passage of time a little more meaningful. Other hypotheses could still be formed, but for now, we will let you have your own opinion.

Aziraphale on the day in question, thought about how to make the best description possible to surprise his loved one ... It had to be something perfect ... But how? He had never done that before… Well, he would try anyway, if he couldn't, he very much doubted that Raphael would give up on hiring him as his helper, especially after the wonderful moments they had shared the night before ... They would be forever etched in his memory as the best he will ever live until then.

After many rehearseals, when he thought he was ready, the Princiaplity went to the same place as last night and was very surprised to see that Raphael was already there waiting for him... He had arrived earlier than he should, and Aziraphale was the one who programmed himself to be on time always. He sighed, realizing that the Archangel was really interested still that was a goo signal nevertheless.... Nervously he walked with unsteady steps to where his beloved was sitting beside him.

"You started your rest early today, Raphael ..." Aziraphale said softly laughing admirably wanting to bring up the subject. "How was your day?" He tried to show interest and not go straight to the point by looking at him with softness and sweetness in his eyes.

Raphael laughed. "I intend to work today. I just changed my shift." That Archangel probably also invented his work shift, something that was well suited to his own needs. Then he got up and went to the shortt Angel and looked at him, making sure that he hadn’t forgotten the promise the night before.

"We are going to work tonight. After you read to me your beautiful description. What do you think of this change?" He smiled looking again at the ones in the place. Then he turned to Aziraphale, running a hand through his soft white hair, noticing how a little shorter he was.

"And then ... Do you want to sit down or ..." He spoke as if giving the other the opportunity to choose how he would do his 'declamation' in a more comfortable way.

"Yes, sir." Aziraphale said promptly when he saw the look the Archangel gave him. He closed his eyes when he felt his hair being stroked. God, how he loved to be treated like that ... He almost tiptoed to receive more affection, like stray dog. "We will work tonight then." He smiled cordially, not daring to disagree with his superior's plans.

"Oh ..." Aziraphale knew what he meant by that suggestion. "I have my description right here ..." he said, proud of himself. Then he went red for an instant. "Would you like to hear it before work or ...?" He suggested still unsure of what he was doing.

He swallowed hard, now was the time. Aziraphale had thought so many times and rehearsed how it would be ... But at the time everything was different. He looked into Raphael's eyes hoping he would choose how best to do that.

"I usually work through the night. Do you usually sleep at this time?" Raphael spoke playfully, although it was still true. For a while Aziraphale would eventually fall asleep with Raphael's abrupt changes in time.

He slid his fingers a little more into his hair and wrapped it in a curl. "Actually, you're not the only one to work with me, so I try to show up at regular times every now and then."

"Oh, the description ... Of course. I want to hear it right now! Before work. I need to know if the description of what I'm going to do next is going to be good ... Not wanting to put too much pressure on you, of course .. . "He spoke playing dirty, knowing that he would make Aziraphale more nervous about it.

"I usually do, but I can adapt without many problems" Aziraphale said certain of himself, he would definitely change his sleep schedule if Raphael wanted to. All he had to do was order.

Aziraphale tilted his head in the direction of the touch and almost moaned softly, how good that was ... "Aren’t I?" He said in an almost sad tone, but curious to know who else worked. He bit his nervous lip ... Besides not being the only one, would he have to be the best? Could he get fired if he weren't so? Oh God...

He heard what the Archangel said and shuddered ... That tone wasn’t one of those which didn’t want to put pressure anymore, in fact quite the opposite. The Angel was immensely nervous and red in the face, his hands were shaking as he took the paper timidly from his pocket. "I ... I didn't memorize it then ... I'll read it to you ..." He cleared his throat and tried to make his voice as confident and harmonious as he could get despite his nervousness.

_"When I saw him pass by for the first time, the sensation he had was difficult to distinguish. His hair resembled the rays of the sun at dusk, a coppery red, with certain golden nuances depending on the luminosity that lit over them. His walk was firm but delicate, sure where he was going, an inviting smile, enchanting everyone who passed him, including me._

_They said that he was the one in charge of creating stars, a task for someone really unique, with a great talent and creativity that could only be given by Her Herself. It was him who made the light ... And gave it meaning, position, and name to be admired by others. Heaven was never the same after his presence. "_

By this time Aziraphale was already shaking and had to swallow and lick his lips several times, his heart was already in his throat from being so nervous. His voice cracked slightly, but he went on.

_"When he had the opportunity to get to know him more ... It was a very pleasant surprise. He shone. Literally. Just like his so famous creations. I was more and more able to be myself with every conversation we had. Our rest time took a whole new meaning for me. His brown eyes sparkled with every sincere smile that was sketched at me and the small fragments on his face gave off the most adorable glow I had the pleasure of staring at._

_All of himself was a work of art, and being invited to share some of my time with him will surely be a gift that I will never be able to repay. Tonight I hope it will be the first of many at his side ... To learn a little about his craft and be a little more enchanted by his being. "_

He looked up a little to read the last lines

 _"That every time I look at the starry sky ... I can remember who is responsible for such beauty, and know that no matter where I am, he will always be close to me."_ Aziraphale finished almost breathless.

Raphael was attentive. His eyes fixed on Aziraphale as he nervously prepared to start his speech. However, as the Principality began to describe, Raphael's expression changed from anguished surprise, denounced by his wrinkled forehead to complete awkwardness.

He would never have imagined that _he_ would be described by the other and even less, he could see himself in those words. They looked so ... So ... Like someone perfect. Or ... Who knows ... Someone that Aziraphale admired beyond what he could predict.

He couldn’t admit to being himself in those words, for he wasn’t so full of himself, and at the same time he couldn’t deny the Angel's ability to write beautiful things.

In the midst of his emotional shock, flushed and embarrassed, he stepped back and tripped over a pebble, eventually falling flat on the floor, but he didn't even feel the impact. The other's words seemed to hit him more and when the final words were spoken, something never happened before in space.

A shooting star was seen, while Raphael suddenly turned to watch what happened, feeling as if a piece of his soul was breaking when he saw one of his creations 'collapse'. A beautiful phenomenon, in reality, but the Archangel failed to interpret at that moment. He looked at Aziraphale with a startled look and looked back to Heaven.

"What was that? What did I do?"

Aziraphale was trying to compose himself when his gaze didn't find Raphael anymore. Being pulled out of his trance abruptly, the image of the Archangel falling down and being followed by the brightness of the star crossing the sky took him by surprise.

"My dear!" The Principality said promptly going to meet the other on the ground offering him a hand. "Did you hurt yourself?" He asked nervously. Aziraphale wouldn't ask about that star now, but it was a very interesting coincidence ...

"You slipped on a pebble and fell down..." he explained getting closer ... Had his description been so bad? Aziraphale looked sad even. "I'm sorry ..." he didn't even know what to say or where to start.

However, Raphael was very nervous, and he was already shedding tears. It was the first time that he had lost his composure in front of another Angel, but certainly for a very legitimate reason. He believed he had made a star fall with something he had done.

"I'm fine... But the star ... It fell ... I made it fall ... It's my fault." He said inconsolably, confusedly, amid tears streaming down his face as he tried to cling to the Principality as a form of support he had temporarily lost to stand, while trying to swallow his sobs. "Aziraphale ... I'm so sorry ..."

He wasn’t certain why he was apologizing for, if for not paying due attention to his Angel's work or for leaving one less star in Heaven for him to watch every night. For failing to keep everything in place like he should.

Aziraphale was petrified to see that the other was shedding tears, had he been hurt that badly? He bit his lip without knowing how to react. He put his hand gently over his wet face "My dear boy, please don't cry ...." He said slightly desperate without knowing how to react.

He heard what the other said and really remembered seeing the star "falling" but for him it had been no big deal ... Until he could really understand what it meant for the Archangel and his job. He felt his trembling hands grab him and he allowed himself to be his support in that moment of dismay.

He hugged him tightly when he heard the apology "Raphael ... Why are you apologizing for...?" He whispered as he rubbed his back affectionately "There's nothing to apologize for, it's okay ... That bright streak across the sky was beautiful ... Gorgeous .... Different and unique ..."

He broke the hug for a moment and looked into his eyes wiping his tears with his thumbs " _Just as you are_." He whispered again more assertively. He couldn't bear to see the other one burst into tears in front of him and not do anything.

"It's alright dear ..." he said again, getting a little closer. "Please breathe ... You created something new at random, you’re an artist, of course, that’s what you do! .... A star ..." He thought for a moment "... Shooting star..." He smiled at him tenderly.

"I'm sorry for my description .... I'm sure it isn't up to what you were expeting ..." he said even more sadly, stroking his face and looking into his eyes, taking care of him and mesmerized by his beauty. He pressed his forehead against his gently "Fust let me work by your side ... Please... That’s all I ask for..." he swallowed, afraid of the answer.

In the middle of the hug, Raphael tried to calm down, feeling the comfort and how soft the other was ... Just like a cloud. "I ... Because ... I dropped a star ... It was yours too! It belonged to everyone ... I ... Didn't know they could fall. I was afraid they would all start falling all of a sudden, it would be a mess! ... "He confessed sniffling, slightly shaking.

"Did you ... Really think it was beautiful? I ... I don't understand ... But, but maybe those things happen from time to time," he said, wiping his tears and looking at Aziraphale. "Shooting star ...? What a beautiful name." If every time a star fell, one day there would be a shower of stars. "T-thanks, Aziraphale ..." He said trying to compose himself and letting go of the other.

"No, everything was fine with your description. It was very beautiful. I just ... I can't see myself in it ... Sorry… I am not all of those things ... I mean, I am not that much." He spoke sincerely.

"It was just one, dear ... You didn't fail anything..." Aziraphale said, placing him on his lap and stroking his soft hair to soothe him. His own heart was racing when he heard that the star was his too ... That was ... Just incredible to hear.

"Even from what you say is supposed to be a mistake, something beautiful can come up from it, Raphael." Aziraphale simply said ... From a friendship between a Principality and an Archangel a truly beautiful feeling was born ... "I'm glad you liked it" He smiled even more ... They didn't even start working together and he was already helping! He was so proud of himself.

At that moment within him, he wished with all his strength that no matter what happened, the two would remain together ... Even if it were just friends. Even on opposite sides… He couldn’t be distant from his Archangel. He squeezed him a little more while he wished silently.

He let the other free himself and take a breath. "You don't have to .... Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, dear Archangel." He said sweetly and slowly approached him again, kissing his cheek tenderly. "Believe me. You are. Indeed you are. I have always seen you like this. From the very first time I laid my eyes on you." he confessed a little more serene.

He was sure Raphael would never look at him that way, that it wasn’t reciprocal at all ... But having the opportunity to be able to verbalize how he felt for his loved one .... It was the best feeling ever. Relieveing... The Angel had learned to love unilaterally ... As well as how to do all good things without ever receiving anything in return ... Just as She had taught him.

"I can't believe I'm on your lap ... I feel like a little boy." Raphael spoke while gazing nostalgically at the firmament, as if he could make out amid countless points of light, a single flame that had gone out. Even if it was just one, it was gone forever. And that was how Raphael first realized one of the harsh lessons about existence. Some things can never be recovered. Once lost, they will be like this for eternity.

"Do you think, Angel? That a good thing can come from a bad one?" He reflected deeply on the subject, but he lacked bad things as an example, except certainly that of a star that falls and turns into a beautiful night show. He looked at the other and smiled slightly.

"Do you think we can wish something every time a star falls?" Sooner or later Raphael would discover that he was a falling expert. A stumbling vaguely downwards expert From the simplest stumble to the collapse of a star, gravity, even if not yet invented, was always forcing its reality downwards. Still, there was hope in the question. A hope perpetuated by generations of humans in the distant future.

"I think I chose the right person. You are very poetic, Azi ... Saying things like 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder' and that kind of catchphrase ..." He received the kisses, this time acting with more serenity. "You are my little cloud ... Those white and cute, without a single drop of rain. Just comfort and calm. Thanks for the description I’ll never forget it..."

Aziraphale blushed realizing what the other one said. He was actually in his lap ... But being placed like that was ... Funny. He placed him even more comfortably on himself, hugging Raphael with affection.

He nodded to calm the other. "Of course it can ... It's not because it was bad that it has to be evil forever." Would it be like a rule? The Principality smiled “So be it, now you just have to spread it out, shooting stars imply wishes, you created them... " it would be like that and soon everyone would know the implied rule. It would certainly become common sense ... Those things that everyone does but no one know where the habit came from.

"Am I?" He said totally embarrassed when he called poetic. He laughed nervously. Aziraphale wasn't used to being praised so spontaneously. "Your .... Cloudy....?" He repeated incredulously that with so little time he already had a loving petname. He squeezed him, laughing even more

"I'm so so happy you liked it!" He didn't even believe. "Yeah ... It's for you ..." he looked in his eyes "All for you ...." he smiled with more affection, his eyes watering too. It wasn’t a simple description. It was all his feelings there ... But he wouldn’t go into that merit ... The warmth and company of his beloved were enough for now. Talkting too much could ruin everything.

"Ah ... I think I better get up ..." Raphael realized how silly he looked and started to stand. He wasn't used to anyone looking after him that way. That didn’t happen. And it was like discovering something totally new, that he might also need someone else, just as Aziraphale seemed to need him on a deeper level. That could be dangerous for sure but who cared?

"Okay ... I don't think it's a lie exactly, is it?" He finally smiled, realizing that the Angel intended to deceive others in general, telling a beautiful story that wasn’t true, but very comforting. "Well, I think the result is what matters. People will be happy making wishes."

"Yes ... Not in the literal sense, of course, but yes, my little cloud. My Angel ..." Was Aziraphale accumulating petnames very quickly "I couldn't think of anything more cute than a little cloud and that doesn't have negative attributes. It's not a pillow or that you’re fat ... It's something very worthy of appreciation that is in a place that everyone wants to reach. Among people's dreams. " he quickly eexplained

Aziraphale agreed with him when he saw that Raphael was getting up and helped him. "Everyone is happy to make wishes even if they aren’t realized, dear ..." he said simply "I myself have my own dreams ... I think you have yours .." he said without going into details this time. But it was something he really believed in. Everyone had something to hold on to, to hope to believe…

"Cloudy is the first petname I have ..." he said awkwardly. Aziraphale was growing redder and laughing softly. "I understand what you mean ... I like that you call me that ..." soon there would be a petname for Raphael too. He held his hand with affection "Your Angel ..." he repeated getting closer, a sincere smile hissing on his lips.

"Maybe we will forget the wishes later ... Or we will not remember asking for a shooting star. I don't know if it's good or bad ..." Raphael thought about what the other said. "Funny, I don't think I ever thought of having anything other than what I already have here ... But ... There must be something else, isn't there? For me to wish or expect ..." He spoke, getting up and turning to look at the other.

"I hope you are happy with it." Of course he was, everything indicated that he was. But the Archangel also called him an Angel a lot, kind of by accident. He looked at the sky again,

"Well, Aziraphale, you are officially my helper now. Can we start working now?" He asked with a smile, while imagining something very silly. How to put a fallen star back. Or was it her will that some stars simply cease to exist? And the he would have to learn how to deal with it.

Aziraphale limited himself to biting his lips. He knew that he shouldn’t go into the merits of that subject ... he would certainly end up talking too much about what or who he wanted ... And what he asked that shooting star for ... He, who witnessed their birth.

"There must be ..." he just said with a weak smile looking into the other's eyes with his slightly wistful ones ... He was sure that this desire would never be forgotten. Now more than ever.

"Yes sir!" He said promptly, letting go of his hands and looking out over the sky, taking out his notebook and putting himself in position to write "Where do we start?" His eyes shone and his smile was the biggest one.

"Well, first we need to move. Remember everything I said about space? Hm ... Let's put it into practice now. Take a deep breath because there is no air there." Raphael joked with a smile. "And remember, no matter what, I'm your point of reference. The red dot." The Archangel didn't joke about it. It seemed that they were really going far away, where all the work happened. The place where it had no end.

And there they went ... Towards the black immensity of space and stars. Aziraphale always attentive where they were and where they were going, keeping close to Raphael and never losing sight of him, eventually taking his hand or arm when he was nervous or very afraid.

_It was the beginning of a beautiful work duo and who knows what else fate would reserve for them both._


	6. A Secret Place

“Close your eyes and take a step forward .... "suggested the Archangel, hoping that the Principality would accept. He held his hand firmly. After that, they would no longer be in Heaven, but in deep space, half-empty, if it weren’t for some creations already brushed in infinite space. Other Angels waited there for their work to begin. For the Archangel. He checked if Aziraphale was by his side and smiled at him. A large space of empty darkness was in front of them.

"Can we start?" Asked the Archangel calmly.

Apparently the other Angels formed a more or less fixed team, which helped Raphael in the creation of stars and other celestial bodies. Almost like a modern-day construction. Someone had the idea and assembles the skeleton and other people join it to complete the job. Aziraphale would be the witness, but a witness with an essential role. Document that it all happened sometime. And how it happened.

Aziraphale swallowed hard listening to that suggestion that was more like an order and did what was asked trusting the Archangel totally but holding his hand all the time. It was an overwhelming void ... It felt like there was no turning back. It was just the two of them in that frightening immensity. The Angel internally was happy that he wasn’t alone.

He could clearly see the other Angels' eyes on him and how confused they seemed with his presence so close to Raphael. Did they suspect something? Even so, he didn't leave his side for an instant... He wasn’t told that. Aziraphale just nodded.

Then he followed the others to work as well. He tried as quickly as possible to narrate, describe and draw everything that happened around him, together with memorizing with precision the work that happened in unison in front of him.

It looked like a work of art and in fact it was. His eyes followed every milimetrically calculated movement of Raphael. It was all artistically perfect. He almost dropped his notes one or two times with so much emotion.

Raphael knew he didn't have to worry too much about the Principality getting lost. He would only check him periodically if he hadn’t strayed from that vastness and if he was following him relatively closely, not being too absorbed in his own descriptions.

What Raphael planned there was something big. The space ahead indicated this. He had spent days waiting for illumination and strength to complete the ideal shape and size. There could be no mistakes. But he had faith that, with Her guidance in his hands, guiding the entire structure he would dedicate to creating, there would certainly be no major problems.

A lot of work would happen after the skeleton of that new place was formed, but the work wasn’t just his, like Aziraphale always thought. Much less it would end in a day, as he had told his cloudy. Angels spoke to him, and as if they were in the modern age on Earth, large scrolls with drawings were shared. Each one showed the nature and purpose of what was being created. But they were only devices that served as some help, not to rely on imagination alone, but to have it registered in some temporary place. Similar to what Aziraphale did, but with less poetry.

Then, further away from the other Angels, the Archangel finally seemed to concentrate deeply, looking at his own hands and the pitch black space in front of him. A growing glow illuminated his body and flowed to his fingertips, first in a strong energy, which could be feared uncontrollable, but little by little, Raphael dealt with it, as if he was dealing with cake dough, slowly making it malleable, until he can expand it with his hands, in a bright spider web, resembling billiards of white stars. The shape finally became fixed, stable and the Archangel released it slowly, as if he still feared that it might move or break. It had become semi-transparent, except for the points of light.

Now it seemed light as a spider web. The Archangel made the last adjustments and blew the formation forward, where the darkness awaited and made it fit there. A beautiful elongated path of stars was present, seeming almost infinite and dispelling all the feeling of emptiness that existed ahead. The Archangel smiled, complacent and satisfied, having partly done his job. He breathed in the air that didn’t exist and turned to the other Angels of his construction.

“I think I need a break. Can you continue from this point for me? ” He asked the other Angels and again checked Aziraphale next to him. It would take a long time to finish that...

Aziraphale, although impressed with everything, could see Raphael's affectionate look taking care of himself from time to time. It was at least different than the stern looks he gave the other Angels. He wasn’t so careful with others, only with himself .... It made him feel special.

Aziraphale had no idea of the greatness of the other's ideas and projects ... He just wanted to follow closely and have the chance to document everything. After all, he was the only one in charge of that ... It had to be perfect.

Seeing Raphael really creating stars for a moment, Aziraphale was sure that if he was breathing he would have stopped for sure. The beauty of such luminosity and brightness in front of him was unspeakable. If he thought the Archangel was already beautiful ... Now he was even more sure. It was something unique ... a warmth he could feel so powerful and vivid. Aziraphale would start clapping to that creation but restrained himself.

The Principality just nodded with his mouth was still half open, staring at the beauty in front of him. Oh dear Lord... Would he have enough words to narrate what he had seen?

Raphael looked a little tired after all that effort. It was time to leave and let the others work, helping to complete that little divine work. He felt satisfied, with the feeling of having been faithful to the instructions he received for enlightenment of Her creation.

He turned to the Principality, who seemed a little dull after everything he had witnessed and approached him with a smile, while the other Angels spread out working on what had been agreed upon earlier.

"I think I ended my work here, Cloudy ... Are you still writing or are you going to leave it to do it when you're in a quieter place?" He asked with a sly smile.

Aziraphale could see how tired the other was and soon approached to offer support. "I-I think I can write more later ..." He said awkwardly. How he wished he could do great things, beautiful and majestic like the other one.... But he was just ... Aziraphale. Or as he was called, Cloudy.

He smiled awkwardly at the petname and took his hand. "Let’s get some rest?" He smiled warmly, "Or do you still have a second part?" He asked more curious about the job.

"Hmm ... rest yes, sleep no. And no, there is no part two today. I can't think of anything complex for a long time. I already did what I could for today ... What about you? What do you want to do? It's time for good Angels to go to sleep. " He joked.

He looked at the space that no longer seemed so empty or dark over there and wondered what Aziraphale would like to do. Considering the time, would he still like to show that special place he had talked about previously?

"Is there nothing in this vastness that you want to show me?" The Angel asked all curious if they could do more things there or if they could see more things ... After all he looked like a child discovering a new toy. Along with the best company he could wish for.

"I don't feel sleepy for now ... I have to start writing right away while everything is fresh in my head ..." He said pointing to it and laughing. He would even do it in the company of the Archangel but thought he would be very bored by the idea.

"Ah, I know! We can go to my secret place and there I can put my ideas on paper, what do you think? Do you want to join me?" He said excitedly without an apparent drop of sleep. In no way did he want to lose an instant of the other's company.

"Well ... there are other places, but we had agreed to visit your favorite place first, didn't we? I don't mind relaxing a little while you write. That's what I do best." And Raphael laughed. It was already becoming a joke that he always seemed to be lazy or sleepy, but the truth was that his job demanded a lot from him in a short time.

"I confess that I am very curious to know this place! You have already created expectations in me about it that I try to imagine what kind of place it might be ..." He spoke with a soft smile while watching the other in his excitement.

"For sure there you will be able to rest well." the Principality said smiling certain of him and his little place.

"Let’s go back to Heaven and I’ll guide you there." Aziraphale smiled a little more playfully "Close your eyes when you get there, will be a surprise huh?" he said wanting to play with the other.

"Okay. Let's go," he said, taking his hand. For some reason, Raphael felt it was safer for the other like that.

"When we're close, don’t let me look and also don't let me trip over another peeble on the way, please. I don't want to risk ruining the job I just started ..." He joked, after all, it wasn't the stones along the path that made him drop stars, but how messed up his feelings were for a moment.

Aziraphale just laughed when he remembered the pebble’s incident. If that were the case every time he stumbled ... Holding his hand tightly there they were back in heaven in the blink of an eye.

With a little wave of his hand he had a blindfold, and he carefully put it on his beloved. "Now you're going to have to trust me," he whispered by his ear.

Aziaphale placed his hands on his shoulders and walked slowly until he found his favorite spot. They walked a little, and the Principality could feel the other's muscles tightening under his hands as Raphael became more and more anxious.

After a few minutes of walking they were there. Aziraphale could already feel the sweet smell in the air and hear the rustle of leaves on the trees. "Okay dear, you can take off the blindfold now," he said in a whisper, and took hold of his hand. he had to stay close to see the other's reaction

"I liked the trick" Ah, if Raphael had known that in the future Aziraphale would be an amateur magician, he wouldn’t have said that. Anything he was thinking was interrupted by that whispering close to his ear. He felt a shiver and feared it would be noticeable, but he kept trying to hide it, while being guided by the other, a little hesitant because he wasn’t used to seeing anything, but trusting that the Angel wouldn’t let him bump into something or fall.

He felt when his surroundings began to change, especially the wind, that by that hour was very cold and some leaf that brushed itself on its way to be taken away. He untied the blindfold and looked. "Angel ... this place is just perfect!"

Aziraphale smiled kindly when his place was immediately praised, it was really beautiful. The landscape was composed of a large and leafy cherry tree. Pink petals covered the ground and the crown of the tree. As the wind blew, some fell and left their sweet scent in the air. It was intoxicating and difficult to describe such beauty.

"This is where I go to ... when I want to be alone." He very much doubted that no one had ever been there, but, until that moment, he had never met anyone at the same time as him in his little refuge.

The Principality took care of the tree whenever he could. He talked to her, told about his monotonous life ... of his dreams, and of course of his secret passion for the Archangel who accompanied him now. "My little piece of heaven" Literally. "And now it's yours too." He said walking slowly towards the tree. "Come on, the view sitting under it is even more beautiful." Encouraged him.

"Wow, it is so beautiful that it is like a huge flower!" Raphael and his original thoughts. "I have never seen such a beautiful tree."

He followed the Principality on his slow walk and held a petal, feeling the texture. They were the color of Aziraphale's cheeks when he was excited or embarrassed. "A place like this is exactly what I expected from you ... it is ... hmm ... I don't think I have a word to describe ..." _Romantic._ It was what he meant.

"Oh, thanks for sharing your place with me. It really means a lot. Do you really want to do that?" He might not return there if the other preferred and his Angel's secret would remain guarded. He stopped under the tree, watching it as something completely new, which was exactly what it looked like to him. "It has a delicate smell ..."

Aziraphale laughed even louder making his belly shake, he hadn't thought of the tree that way, but it was true, the whole tree looked and smelled like a gigantic flower. It was as beautiful as one "It took me days to finish drawing it in my catalog ..." He confessed suddenly. "And I don't think the result was that good ..." He said sadly knowing that capturing all that beauty was really no easy task.

"Neither do I ... that's why I made my place here." He shrugged ... It was a place he couldn't describe, which matched the feeling he had when he saw Raphael, which he also couldn't describe.

The two things complemented each other in some way, even though the other didn’t know it. He took the other's hand and invited him to sit down. "I do." That was all he said, keeping the Archangel's two hands between his.

A petal from the tree fell in the middle of their hands and Aziraphale couldn't help but blush. It was all very delicate ... even for him ... He didn't know if he was doing the right thing, but something inside him said to go ahead.

"There was no other being that I would like to share all of this with than you, Raphael." He said and raised his head looking into his eyes slightly more serious than before. For him, all this had a very profound meaning that unfortunately he couldn’t share with the other but couldn’t hide either. Another light breeze passed and again the smell of the cherry tree together with the scent of his beloved Archangel invaded his nostrils ... Aziraphale felt himself melting.

"Ah, I'm sure it did look good." Raphael assured the other while watching around the place. He sighed as if thinking far away, about things that hadn’t yet been created and returned to reality with the words of his friend.

"It seems like a good place to .... enjoy the time with someone you care about." It was the closest he could get to an accurate description of what that place evoked. The feeling that you should share it with someone special, but he didn't want to put words in Aziraphale's mouth ... maybe he was just showing him the place nothing else.

He was going to say something when the petal fell and Raphael had to restrain himself from laughing, looking at the other's pink face. "Okay, I'm honored that you want to share it with me. I promise to take care of your favorite refugee with care. With respect, that's what I meant." It was full dawn and if it was a more modern time, he would have offered a coat so that the other wouldn't feel cold, but that wasn’t the case. "Are you going to keep holding my hands?" There was not much he could do in that position.

This was a strange moment, in which the silence seemed to have more meaning than the conversation they were having and every word said had an air of superficiality. Aziraphale was clearly absorbed in something deeper, though not entirely inaccessible.

The smell, the night, the landscape, everything formed a set that seemed too perfect to be wasted, however, Raphael had no idea what he felt naturally, but eagerly impelled to do, while looking at the petal-colored face of his Angel .

Aziraphale just nodded. This was the good place for anything ... mainly to rest, which was what he liked to do the most. "Oh, I’m sorry ..." The other's hands were almost as soft as that simple petal ... it was almost impossible not to be stroking them ... it had soon become a habit. He smiled slightly embarassed, his face still pink, letting him go.

A little awkwardly, the Angel sighed and bit his lip, thinking he had done something wrong and his eyes went to look at the horizon. The dawn could end at any moment, it was the time he most enjoyed creating and talking to that inanimate being who was his greatest confidant.

"I ..... if you don't mind, I'll write a little bit about today's work, before I forget ....." He said in an almost whisper, keeping his gaze away from the other as if his presence bother him in any way. "I would be very happy if you stayed with me." He almost begged him to stay.

"Okay ..." Raphael said complacently, shrugging his shoulders for a moment. He had nothing more to say, so he fell silent while the desire for something unknown took over. It was both a relief and a frustration when Aziraphale broke the perfection of the moment, dodging to fulfill the task that he himself had demanded of the assistant.

"Okay ... enjoy while the ideas are fresh in your memory, Cloudy." He sighed without understanding why he was so discouraged. Maybe tiredness, but he knew well that tiredness had a very different flavor.

"I can sit around here, if you allow me to take a nap next to you..." Good habits should never be put aside. But if he was supposed to keep his company awake, he might as well warn.

"Of course I allow you" Aziraphale said without thinking much with a sweet smile on his face. "I'm sure you are tired after your work up there ...." He straightened up and put his back against the tree trunk.

"I'll be right here when I wake up. Don't worry." He said simply when he saw the Archangel close his eyes to recover his energy after work. He wasn't going to ask him to stay awake just to watch him write. It didn't even make sense.

-x-

A few minutes passed and Aziraphale had put everything he could on paper. Everything he had remembered. Every little detail of that magnificent creation he had witnessed. Nor did he feel time pass. He just glanced at his friend from time to time to make sure he was okay.

When he was about to finish his duty, he felt a light weight on his shoulder. He looked to the side and his eyes widened. Still unconscious, there was Raphael, using his fluffy shoulder as a support for his rest. His heart almost went out of his mouth and he had to leave his notes for an instant.

The place was so comfortable and fragrant, that the Archangel easily succumbed to tiredness and fell into a deep sleep, dreaming indistinctly of good things that reflected the physical well-being he felt. He didn’t notice when he ended up slipping to the point of leaning on Aziraphale, but he felt that the surface was even more comfortable.

Then, in a small imbalance inof the Principality, he ended up slipping further and falling into his lap. Almost without giving him time to react, he hugged the other by the waist, probably mistaking his Angel for a strangely heated pillow.

Aziraphale could see that his friend now touching him couldn’t be on a light rest, his breath betrayed how heavy his sleep was. That was a good thing, maybe he hadn't even realized how close the two were. He straightened up and the Angel could only swallow hard, avoiding breathing hard to keep him sleeping. This was a precious moment that seemed that any moment with any movement would ruin it.

That's when it happened, Raphael slid into his lap. The Principality's once rosy face turned red as a cherry. Oh heavens what should he do now? He was hugged and became even more awkward. Should he wake him up?

He moved a little and the Archangel gave no sign that he would wake up. Aziraphale sighed, he was so close, so dangerously close ... But at the same time so far ... A lump was forming in his throat little by little, he bit his lips hard while his eyes stung with tears. His hand went to the other's fiery hair, stroking it and he looked up to try to avoid crying. The Principality was almost desperate by now.

As if recognizing that wasn’t really his pillow, Raphael shifted his position again, releasing the other and lying facing upwards. Eyes closed in a peaceful sleep. Even unconscious, it was as if he was watching Aziraphale in his agony and trying to take care of him, although he was unaware of the motivation behind it and his contained cry. But it is clear that Raphael was truly asleep and it was all just an impression.

When looking at the serene, unconscious face of his beloved one, Aziraphale could no longer contain his tears and sobbed softly, placing his hand in front of his mouth to contain the strangled noise that erupted from his throat.

It was good, but too painful to have him there. He couldn't kiss Raphael, he couldn't tell him the truth, and he was right there, sleeping peacefully in his lap, so close to him, and he didn't know nor could he respond to his true feelings.

Still, he was emotionally so far away even physically right there. Aziraphale squeezed his eyes shut and let the tears come. His now trembling hand stroked the other's hair carefully not to wake him up... It was all he could do as the tightness in his chest only increased.

_He carefully pulled him closer, slowly taking his unconscious body, trying to capture what he could of that moment as he wept softly, for the first time not only with the tree as a witness of his sorrow._


	7. Kiss

_Flashback on_

_A long time ago, Aziraphale didn’t even have in mind that he would fall head over heels in love with that Archangel whose name was Raphael. However, anyone who might think that feelings only surfaced after meeting him was mistaken._

_Long before any contact, the Principality already had a different heartbeat for him ... Especially after what happened on a specific occasion, when the Angel, still without his sword and his attribute, overheard the conversation between Raphael and another Archangel, Miguel, by far, but perfectly._

_"But how dare you question Her orders? Things are like this because She wants, Raphael, you can't just change or act the way you want because you think differently." Miguel said totally nervous not believing in that his mate was saying._

_Raphael spoke in a very calm way, while he seemed to reflect. "I don't consider it questioning an order. We are all creations of the Almighty. So why shouldn't I consider other Angels of lower castes worthy of love and respect?"_

_"I didn’t say that they are not worthy Raphael, they should only be treated as inferior by us because they are inferior and they owe us respect and obedience .... This is a hierarchy created by Her to have order and harmony, She works in mysterious ways as they say... Which we must not question, just obey. ... " She said back with a shrug._

_An Archangel defending that any kind of Angel could go around giving orders or disobeying their commands? To be heard as if they could give an opinion on something? Such an audacity!_

_"Yes, of course there is a hierarchy. I am not saying that there is not. But I see no point in making someone feel inferior simply because they are elsewhere in the hierarchy. Why be purposefully unreachable?" It was almost as if Raphael was saying that while he was doing a job at Her command, hierarchy applied, but the rest of the time, why point out differences? They could all be together as mates, or friends…_

_Aziraphale's eyes widened from where he was behind the trunk of a tree listening to someone else's conversation. Was Raphael really defending his caste and saying that everyone was equal? Did that mean that at some point the two of them could talk to each other as equals?_

_His heart raced and he felt his knees weak, God what he was saying there was very dangerous if it was reported to Her .... Aziraphale knew well the consequences of a rebel Archangel, but his heart and mind were too busy thinking about positive possibilities of it all._

_"Raphael, you're one of the Archangels with the most different and strange thoughts I've ever seen and heard..." Miguel said, shaking her head. For her it was a matter of just accepting things as they were and not of questioning or wanting to know the real reasons for divine plans. They were simply beyond their understanding._

_"Be careful what your thoughts may cost you one someday ..." she said in a warning tone ... If he got involved with some of the lower caste .... Or influenced others to think like him .... That could cause serious problems ... maybe even a rebellion, was Raphael aware of this?_

_"Thanks for the advice, Miguel. For now, I think I can learn from them to the same extent as they do with me. And who would give that kind of help when your task is to have good ideas, huh?" Raphael seemed not to be guided by closed concepts, but yes by rational thinking. This made his ability to respond to authority somewhat lamely._

_On the other hand, he left many possibilities open, especially for the so-'hated' knowledge, while the other Angels of all castes seemed to conform to what they were told and to think beyond that wasn’t well regarded._

_"Having some friends can't be that bad ..." He concluded._

_Miguel just made a face at what Raphael said. For her, nothing that the inferiors said should be taken into consideration, especially if it had to do with the work of superiors. That was too surreal for you’re her understanding and way of thinking ... But she didn't want to be arguing with the Archangel now, too tired to try to change someone else’s mind. She knew the consequences that would happen to him if he kept that kind of thinking._

_Aziraphale heard the last words and fell to the ground, making a small noise and almost catching their attention. 'Friend' he thought. Cuz, he had none ... Neither did the Angels of the same caste as him wanted to be his friends ... Would he ever be friends with an Archangel ...? How foolish to think that. He put his hand on his chest, felt his heart racing and took deep breaths trying to calm himself down._

_Raphael shrugged innocently and ended the conversation, sighing. Certainly with Miguel he wasn’t going to find a subject that wasn’t strictly protocol and it wasn’t what he was looking for at that moment when both of them were tired._

_"Well, I'm leaving Miguel. I have to think about different configurations for a new constellation. I hope it will set us up for a productive day." And with that he jumped up and walked carelessly as if there was no hurry for anything. The noise made by Aziraphale went unnoticed by him, at least_

_Miguel just waved goodbye to his friend from afar, if he had more to do, it was not up to her to get in the way. She had heard the strange noise of something falling but decided not to mention anything. They were going to get into a long discussion that certainly wasn't going to get anywhere. "We talk another time .." she said and went on her way._

_Aziraphale sat on the ground still dumbfounded by what he had heard trying to process his Archangel's point of view in his stunned head. At that moment he was sure that what he felt for him wasn’t just a mere admiration .... It was much stronger than that. And that all the conversations he had with his confidant cherry tree would now have an even more special tone of hope ... That one day, who knows, maybe Raphael and him could really be friends?_

_Within him, that moment, a new feeling was born ... It grew and got stronger as the words of the other never left his mind .... Raphael looked at him as an equal ... If they ever met, he knew he wouldn’t be treated as inferior, even though he was just a simple Principality._

_The feelings for Raphael consolidated there at that moment, watching him from the distance._

_Flashback off_

Back in the present moment, Aziraphale was crying and his tears were gradually flowing, reaching the other Archangel’s face in his lap. Raphael felt disturbed in his sleep by something wet and warm and woke up with no idea what was going on, finding his Angel with red and puffy eyes, amid a weeping that he did not didn’t understand why. He sat looking at the other and stroked his almost white hair, speaking softly.

"Cloudy, you’re raining ..."

Aziraphale gave another ripped sob when he realized he had woken the other up. He shouldn't have done that, silly angel! Then he wiped the corners of his eyes ...

"I-I am fine ..." he lied letting his hair be stroked. "Sorry ... It was that wind ... Something must have got into my eye ..." He invented the worst excuse he found, his other hand still unconsciously steady holding the Archangel against him. He sniffed and took a deep breath "Forgive me I didn't want to wake you up in your rest, my dear." He said trying to sound normal but his voice was totally broken.

"Angel ... don't you really want to tell me?" Raphael wasn't going to force it, but it didn't make sense for the other to be keeping everything to himself now that they were really friends, close ones, even if Aziraphale had no other ones.

He looked at him softly, feeling that a hand was pulling him firmly, perhaps without the Angel realizing it, but he felt that small detail. It was amazing how beautiful Aziraphale could be even crying. He smiled internally, not wanting to ignore the other's suffering or make fun of it.

The hand holding the Archangel was now trembling, along with his lower lip that quivered at the reaction of the other. Looking at his eyes, Aziraphale could not lie or try to dodge at that moment .... Raphael's beauty along with his serene words prevented him from hiding anything any longer ...

"I ..." he whispered uncertainly putting his hand on the one stroking his hair. "Not just ... I want to befriend you ..." he, in a state that was filled with emotion, wasn’t sure how to start talking.

"What I feel is a lot stronger ... And I've been feeling like this much longer than I know you, Raphael." He confessed as more tears came out of his deeply blue eyes, already waiting for rejection. Now his whole body was shaking with fear, and the hand gripped him slightly tighter, tensing.

"And now you're here ... Physically so close .... But…" he swallowed and smiled sadly "Emotionally so far ..." he whispered ... The words barely came out. "I don't know what to feel ... What should I do ..." he sobbed looking desperate "I don't want you to leave me ..." he hid his face with one hand ....

" _Raphael I love you in a way that Angels are not allowed to_ _love, my dear_ ... Not how they should love all things .... Can you understand me....? " He shook his head. Now it was time for rejection, the slap, the sermon. He closed his eyes tightly expecting the worst and cried even more bending over.

Raphael listened carefully and his expression twitched several times as if he struggled to understand. What could be there besides what they had? What more could two Angels have than a deep and true friendship?

He considered not knowing, however, a voice coming from somewhere that Raphael didn’t know, the same voice that before he went to sleep drove him closer to Aziraphale seemed to try to shout again, commanding and at the same time warning. Still, Raphael played the fool, because transgressions were something he had been flirting with for a long time. Supporting one hand on the Angel's shoulder and lifting his face with the other, he asked.

"What is that that is not within our reach? What should we not do? How is that way of loving Angel’s aren’t supposed to?" If the Principality said, perhaps he could love him in the same way. A challenge, sometimes it was all Raphael needed.

Aziraphale didn’t believe that he would have to explain to the other about all this ... He had clearly heard that Raphael wanted a friendship between high and low level Angels ... How did Raphael not understand other ways of loving?

"It is something less heavenly and pure ... A kind of love that only lovers could live ... Something that has more to do with desire and corporeal bodies than with being platonic and ethereal ...." he explained in the best way he could when his face was lifted and blushed.

Staring into his eyes, his expression softened a little "I ... I can show you better in actions than words ..." He wasn’t the best at talking ... Maybe at acting ... He licked his suddenly dry lips and looked at his eyes, trying to show him what he imagined.

"That way of ... Loving ..." Aziraphale instinctively pulled the other closer, leaving their faces practically inches apart and their breaths mixing. "If you let me ..." his hand went to his face, the wind rustled the pink petals again making some fall lightly like feathers around the two ... Time seemed to stop for the couple. The tree seemed to encourage the two to go on.

Raphael honestly didn't understand much of Aziraphale's explanation. He was smart but very naive. He had nothing to compare with his friend's words. Everything seemed very celestial and pure until that moment.

However, when Aziraphale spoke that way, something popped inside him. He breathed more anxiously, watching the Principality run his tongue over his lips. With the sudden proximity, then all the pieces seemed to fit for him.

He smiled at the other's flushed face, knowing he only needed to give a little boost to get what he wanted. They were already so close that the next step seemed natural and not so 'forbidden' at that moment.

He closed his eyes and went a little forward, until he felt the Angel's lips brush against his own, with a good shiver going through his body. He didn’t make a sound that would break the almost silent dawn at the end.

Aziraphale on the other hand seeing that the other remained silent began to become even more nervous. His explanation wasn’t the best of all ... but that kiss ... It was what he had waited for so long. A small sound similar to a sigh / moan passed through his lips as he met Raphael's. It was enough to seal the magic of that moment.

A stubborn, lonely tear streamed from one of his eyes and he stood there petrified, almost without reaction. His two hands went to the sides of Raphael's face but he didn't deepen the kiss, afraid to break the spell. He closed his eyes and stood there, slightly trembling, begging God that Raphael wouldn’t run away.

Raphael also thought Aziraphale was going to run. After all, wasn't that wrong? For some reason, something inconceivable? So why neither seemed to be afraid of being punished? Perhaps regret would come later ... with more understanding, less emotions.

Fearful of damaging something there, he also had, after all, he literally didn’t quite know what he was doing, but he pulled Aziraphale closer by his neck, almost forcing him to take some action. He moaned softly.

Aziraphale with that tug could no longer think correctly. He opened his mouth in the reflection and accidentally deepened that forbidden kiss. Hearing the Archangel stifling a moan was the last straw for the rest of his sanity ...

His hands grasped his red curls and he let himself be taken by the moment, never having kissed anyone before but now wanting to find out how it was with Raphael. He moaned slightly louder against the other's mouth and now his hands pulled him closer by his waist. Their bodies collided, and a slight wave of electricity traveled through the Principality’s body. He didn't want to and wouldn't stop now.

Raphael's body seemed to tense and at the same time, he felt his head light, as if he couldn't think straight, all very unreal for him. However, his heart was beating fast and his face was flushed, while he, just like Aziraphale, felt the urge to deepen the kiss.

One hand slid behind the other's back, while the other continued to hold him by the back of his neck, albeit without much force, but unconsciously indicating that he felt that the Angel was _his_. That he felt Aziraphale belonged to him. Another murmur as he felt his lips opening the way to find something warmer, which the Archangel longed for.

The tongues of both met on the way making the kiss even deeper. There was no turning back now. Aziraphale was completely involved in the whirlwind of feelings that dominated him and wanted nothing different. It was as if the reality around him had disappeared and only the two of them were left.

He felt that possessive hold on him and didn’t object, just surrendering under the touch of the other. After all, he was his. Aziraphale had always belonged with him ... In fact, he needed it to feel complete. The Principality melted under that firm touch and let himself go.

It was an incredible discovery. Raphael didn't know that ... two people could feel that way and maybe, he suspected, there was even more, since he felt compelled to do more, even if he didn't know exactly what could possibly be.

For now that kiss was good enough and that was what he knew, while breathing hard, playing hide and seek with Zira's tongue, while his hand went up a little, caressing the other's white hair. Were they friends now ... or something else? He knew so little that he only understood why it had been said that it was wrong. And that worried him a little.

Aziraphale at this point could only concentrate on the kiss and those hands all over his body. He could have sworn that the other was smiling at each almost combined movement they made together. He also smiled alone ... Very happy that his dream was coming true.

Without thinking of anything else, his hand followed another path, downwards, which had nothing to do with friendship this time ... He slid between the Archangel's legs, clearly knowing where he wanted to touch him. They were alone there for sure and the day was about to dawn ... No one would find them there ... And the Principality saw no sign of retention or hesitation in the other.

Raphael felt his hand going to the middle of his legs. Soon the thought that something more serious was happening occurred to him and that this something could have consequences for both of them. But mostly for Aziraphale.

Because he was of a lower hierarchy, the blame would fall on him more strongly or even totally. All this, the Archangel thought in a fraction of a second and moved away by a kind of sudden panic, he took Aziraphale's hand, preventing it from reaching its destination and said:

"No. Let's stop here."

Aziraphale was removed from his trance immediately upon feeling his hand being held. A certain force was used and he immediately tensed himself whole, regretting bitterly for having let himself be carried away. He looked into the other's eyes and didn't understand the abrupt change in behavior ... Did Raphael already regret what he did?

He licked his lips, still tasting like the other. "I’m sorry." it was all that could say even not feeling sorry at all "I thought you were enjoying it" He amended already looking at some point in the grass.

His heart was already racing and now he didn't know what was coming next. He bit his lip nervously expecting a sermon or some negative response from the other. God he was on the verge of a meltdown ...

"You said we could be punished. I don't want us to be," Raphael said simply, when he wanted to say so many other things... "You said it was wrong. That what we’re doing is considered wrong." Only one kiss might not be, but he didn't know about the rest. Aziraphale seemed to understand things he didn't ...

"But ..." Raphael had a point but even so Aziraphale didn’t want to give up "It isn’t wrong if what I feel for you is true" he frowned as he spoke to the Archangel looking back at him. "And if we are punished, only I will be. I would acquit you." He would do it without thinking twice. He would set himself on fire for Raphael easily. The Principality didn’t look like he was going to give up that easily, he approached again pulling the arm Raphael was holding to make his point.

"I didn't say it wasn't true ... but the others won't take it for granted ..." Raphael argued, keeping in mind how rigid Archangels rules used to be, for example. The context didn't matter. But only the action itself.

"I don't want you to be punished. That's what I don't want. Don't you understand?" He spoke with a little exaltation. He felt pulled and looked like he hadn't made himself understood. Raphael didn't want to, not now and not in the way that Aziraphale wanted to impose.

"No, Aziraphale. Calm down!" He pleaded already desperate without knowing what else he could do to make the other stop.

Aziraphale could already feel the pain of rejection and his eyes stung with unshed tears. Now that he was really going to be abandoned. Raphael's arguments weren’t wrong, quite the contrary ... But he didn't want to listen, he couldn't just let him go blinded by his broken heart’s pain and his feelings.

"I don't care about any punishment as long as you're okay." Aziraphale blinked hard trying to avoid tears. "I ... _I love you Raphael_ ..." He said at once and him again, this time kissing him one more time. He started the kiss in a desperate way, so that the other wouldn't leave and he wouldn’t have how to escape.

Raphael was a little frozen by the revelation. He knew it wasn’t an 'ordinary' kind of love by his tone of voice and, at the same time, he wondered if what he felt for Aziraphale was the same kind of love. He was so confused! And the Angel kissing him forcibly didn’t help at all.

He felt that the other couldn’t respect his limits. A small limit he had placed on their protection. To have time to understand all the turmoil of emotions that he wasn’t used to and that no one had taught him how to deal with.

He wouldn’t be well if Aziraphale didn’t. Couldn't he understand that? He pushed the other away again, now more firmly with a certain discomfort because he was rejecting him, but also because he felt that everything was wrong there. Raphael couldn’t live with the fact Aziraphale was punished cuz of him!

"Azi ... I don't know ... you don't understand me .. Look I’m sorry…. I….”

"No!" Aziraphale said, shaking with anger and sadness at being rejected, everything was hurting, inside and out "You who don't understand ... You ask me to tell you how I feel .... Then you kiss me ... so that everything is fine, I can go on, then you ask me to stop and push me away even knowing how I feel for you... " by now, poor Angel was crying freely.

" _You're just another one using me! Just like all the others did!"_ He said cruelly without thinking about the consequences "You’re just another one taking advantages of me, you mustn't feel anything for me!" He burst out sobbing. "Except pity, as all the Angels feel sorry for me!", he expelled all his feelings and wounds.

He opened his blue eyes, bloodshot now from crying. " _I should never ever have told you how I feel!"_ He swore regret at that moment, crying with a broken heart. His face was now contorted in pain, quite different from the old days when Raphael met him.

"Not at all! You got it all wrong ... I ... I think am in..." Raphael tried to defend himself in the face of the other's reaction. He feared to tell the truth and Aziraphale in the state he was in would only put himself further at risk. That is why he didn’t declare his feeling. It would have seen like a desperate way to deal with everything.

"I just wanted to protect you. Sorry ... _You're going too fast for me, Zira_ ..." He said before, without thinking, running out of there. Raphael didn't know how to explain the whole situation. As soon as he walked away from the Principality and all his feelings, he could feel that he was crying too.

Tears heated his face as he ran away, running unknown paths in the forest, since it was the Angel who had led him there.

He certainly loved Aziraphale, too, and could hardly say what their future might be like after that disagreement. However, at that moment everything he felt was more than rational and he couldn’t stay there anymore seeing the state the other was in and the things Aziraphale was telling him.

It was a searing pain, almost as deep as the other's. He feared so many things .... Losing Aziraphale. Distracted and running as fast as he could, Raphael ran into another Angel, taller and stronger than him and with the impact, he fell down sitting, trying to gather the pieces of himself, while automatically apologizing.

"Sorry, I wasn't paying attention ..." The sentence was halfway there, just like him, when Raphael aimed at the Angel who he had hit.

Aziraphale was petrified where he was while watching the Archangel as he ran away as if his life depended on it. He had indeed been dismissed and rejected as he imagined he would be ... but in a much ruder and crueler way than he had expected.

He didn't shout for Raphael to come back or stop, he didn't call his name, nothing. He just let the tears fall together with the pink petals while he felt he didn't have the strength to leave or even to gather his pieces back into place and stand up.

Meanwhile far away, a pair of blood-red eyes stared at the Archangel lying on the ground after the unplanned encounter took place. A smile broke out where disapproval and annoyance should have appeared, but the other Archangel's features were far from it. As if he was waiting for that to happen.

"You should be more careful where you are going running this way, Archangel Raphael." The voice hissed and a hand appeared to help him up.

_It was who Raphael thought it was._


	8. Deal

Raphael wiped away the tears with the back of his hand, trying to hide them, still stunned by the previous event and the sudden encounter with an unexpected one. Let's say that if a ranking of celebrities existed in Heaven, that Archangel would be on top of them all.

He was rarely seen and when he was, was usually received with great contentment. Even though the concept of 'friendship' seemed unnecessary in Miguel's view, it was clear that many wanted to be friends with Lucifer for some reason.

Raphael and Lucifer had never spoken before, as in the case of Aziraphale and Raphael, at the beginning of this story. And this friendship too, if we cannot call it promising, was certainly a watershed in the life of the latter. Struggling to find appropriate words, he ended up saying what he really thought.

"I didn't think I would meet you at this time and place. I wouldn't even imagine meeting anyone right here right now..." Did he ...? Nah ... it was pure coincidence.

"Really a curious time to meet someone." The other said, still smiling, realizing that Raphael was trying in vain to hide his tears. Lucifer could see from afar that kiss that happened. Of course, he would act as if he didn't know anything ... But he knew that behind that simple gesture there was more hidden things for sure.

He continued with his hand extended offering help. "When I can't sleep I decide to wander around ... That was one of those nights." He shrugged as if it was something quite normal to do and ordinary. "What about you? What were you doing running around these hours? Exercising?" He commented and laughed as if he didn't know anything.

Raphael then woke up to the hand hanging in front of him and accepted his help to get up. "Thank you." He spoke, removing the dirt from his clothes. Lucifer seemed much more adult and imposing from that distance. But, still with a broken heart for the event with Aziraphale, it was difficult to hide his sadness.

"Yes, certainly an unusual time. But I usually sleep during the day and work at night, so it's not that strange for me." It was a good reason to be awake at that time and it was still true. The place, however, was equally bizarre for both to be. "Do you know this place well? I confess I'm a little lost.”

Lucifer silently analyzed every move of the Archangel, noticing how his soul remained in pieces despite everything. He put both hands back when he was standing next to him, still smiling.

"Oh it's true, you create stars, right?" He said already knowing well what the other worked with. The news spread and as he was known, he knew more or less by other Angels everything that happened without having to go to the source to find out.

"Exhaustion? Working too hard?" He heard the last question and looked around "Oh it seemed you were running as if you knew where you were going, we are in the middle of the forest but I do know how to get out of here, please follow me." He said and turned around with the mischievous smile, waiting for the other to follow him.

Maybe they could talk a little bit about what was making the Archangel so… distressed. "There is a beautiful lake not far from here. Great place to rest if I may say so." He completed seeming serene.

"Yes. Stars and stuff... Ah ... I wouldn't say that, I rest a lot... Kind of lazy I am…. Must confess." Raphael heard what the other was saying, still not wanting to make his secret obvious. Not that he thought he couldn’t trust the other, but he was an Archangel and all the Angels had more or less the same line of thought. If Lucifer knew what was going on between him and Aziraphale the worst could happen and he was getting scared.

"Like I said, I got lost in this forest. I went to take a nap in a new place and I didn't remember the way back. So I was … A bit nervous and started running..." Oh ... lying wasn’t the best way to deal with Lucifer, but what else could he do? For Aziraphale he would do that. To protect him. In addition, maybe many other things.

Lucifer from where he was, back turned to Raphael, just rolled his eyes knowing it was a lie. Nobody starts running just because they got lost. But he pretended to buy the lie and kept walking at a steady pace in front of Raphael

"Oh, I see ... Sometimes we really have to pay attention going to new places. Not doing it alone it’s a good decision.... You should pick someone to go with you…" He turned his face away side with a peculiar smile "Especially someone who know the new place and can guide you. To prevent these kind of unfortunate events, Raphael." he said talking about himself and his skills. His ego bigger than that whole forest.

Raphael was certainly trying to cover up someone, and with that lie, it made clear for Lucifer he wasn’t walking alone to be that disturbed running away. "I'm glad you found me, I'm going to teach you how to get out of here, it's easy, no rushing, huh? But next time you can try to fly, from above you can see better the exit of the forest than on foot." He said than laughed when they reached the lake.

It was truly beautiful reflecting the dawn sky. Slightly cold but curiously cozy. "There, if you had run just a bit more you’d have fallen into the lake." He laughed harder as he approached Raphael, the same smile on his face. "Are you sure you're okay?" He tried a worried tone of voice when in fact all he wanted to know was just pure interest.

Raphael knew it wasn’t a good lie, but if it could stop Lucifer from asking questions, it would have been enough. "Yes, you are right. Flying would have solved everything, but I think I was overwhelmed by temporary despair that prevented me from thinking about that possibility. I am not the most attentive person there is. You seem to know every nook and cranny of ... everywhere ..." He answered to what he had said about himself. Lucifer either had a lot of confidence, or a lot of knowledge. Or was just full of himself.

"Well ... thanks for helping me. Especially so late, or so early, depending on the point of view," he said looking at the lake. It was beautiful at that time. He wished his Angel was there to see all that beauty with him. He wished they hadn't argued. He sighed.

"It’s okay. I can swim." He joked, but he didn’t expect the sudden approach. Was he worried about him for real? "Erh ... but of course, why wouldn't you be? You are really kind as they say ..." Would Lucifer be different? Genuinely interested in his problem and feelings?

Lucifer shook his head "When I have some free time I usually walk, it's a hobby that I enjoy a lot, I end up discovering many places." Lucifer liked to be left in peace from time to time so discover new places that few Angels knew or attending was a good idea to achieve that goal.

"I make mental maps of them, so I can come back to the ones I most appreciate from time to time. I was coming to the lake when we met." He said looking at those clear cold waters.

"No need to thank me," he said, smiling widely. In reality it was Raphael who tripped over him ... He hadn’t helped much. He shrugged "Thank you. I think an Archangel concerned about the welfare of other one isn’t wrong ..." He said simply. _However lying is wrong_ , he thought to himself. He reached down, picked up a pebble and hurled it against the surface of the water, making it jump above it. He sighed.

"Even if you know how to swim, the water is very cold, it would have been an ugly accident if you drowned." He said more seriously and turned to Raphael no longer smiling "You seemed to run away from something, need some help? ... Why don’t you tell me what’s really happening Raphael?" Lucifer looked into his eyes with his grey ones, ashes like smoke. Persuasive.

Raphael was relatively good at mind maps. He just wouldn't say that now. In any case, it was the first time he had been there and had been keeping his eyes closed all the way while running. But he heard the other. "It looks like an interesting hobby. And quite unusual." Lucifer would certainly hate not to be original and unique.

"Do you really think that?" He always felt alone with his peers. It wasn’t like having a family. Or close friends. They only worked for the same purpose. Till he found Aziraphale of course… But that wasn’t the kind of subject he should talk about with Lucifer. "Of course, something good! But not everyone would agree with that ..." He said following the pebble with his gaze.

Again Lucifer insisted. Raphael knew that he knew something was wrong and honestly, he was getting tired of trying to swallow his crying and fing shitty excuses not to talk about it. Lucifer seemed someone who wouldn’t take a no as an answer.

"I had a fight with a friend ... It was a very ... bad fight," he said, holding back his tears. "I don't know what's going to be for us now ..." He sat on the ground by the lake and covered his eyes with his hands. Deep down, he was still in despair.

Lucifer smiled at his praised hobby. Of course, it was something different and unusual. He was unique .... "Sure. What would Heaven be like if we were selfish with each other? We all have to come together and offer help for a greater good ... It all starts by keeping everyone's well-being at an acceptable level. From the lower to the higher castes. At least that's what I think. " He had a fiery speech despite thinking the opposite. As said, persuasive. Besides that Lucifer knew that Raphael liked to question and get to know why things were like they were.

"That's the good thing about being able to ask and find like-minded people." He said smiling again. "I have more friends of mine who think like that ... I like to have on my side, Archangels who defend the same ideas as mine, you know? It is easier to work, make decisions, movements, those things" he said simply gesturing.

Lucifer realized the other was saying the truth and finally letting his guard down, it was the perfect time to intervene. While Raphael hid his eyes a smile of pure scorn broke out on the other's lips while a different glow lit his eyes.

"Poor thing ... Oh ..." He said approaching and putting a hand over the other's shoulder "I'm so sorry." He said in the most regretful tone of voice he could pretend "But sometimes these things happen ... Especially when you think differently from the other one... And you don't reach a consensus ..." He said simply without knowing what the fight was about.

"Do you want to tell me more about this? That friend seemed close to you for you to be like this ..." He asked, forcing the other to continue while rubbing soothing circles on his back.

"Do you think so too? I think it's a thought ...” Raphael spoke his mind, thoughtful. If we just think about ourselves and our work, things could get difficult ..." He tried to explain, although his reasoning didn't work so well, not as sharp as ever, after all, he was unbalanced by that recent event. Little did he know how what he said made any sense.

"Do you have friends like that? It was all I ever wanted... People who understood my side and didn't just follow rules blindly. I don't know how that sounds to you, but to me ... it seems a little silly to do everything without any kind of reasoning... " He spoke while hugging his knees, ducking his head between them in dismay as he contemplated the first rays of morning shining on the lake in a unique coloring.

"Yes ... what happened happened..." With that friendly, consoling hand, together with soft words, was enough for the Archangel to painfully sob again. "I ... I don't know ... Nor do I understand what really happened ..." He chocked while shedding tears that were still inconsolable.

Raphael wanted so bad to go back to that cherry tree. Say it was okay, beg for forgiveness, that it was just a misunderstanding, to hug Zira as tight as he could and forget about everything. But certain things just couldn’t be fixed easily that way...

Lucifer nodded “Yes, you can be selfish thinking only for yourself, and in a relationship, nobody wants that right?" He smiled a little more, realizing that the other was falling into his game and starting to share his line of thought.

"Oh yes, dear Archangel, I do have several ones in fact." He said caressing his back with concern seeing the other so sad and broken "Blind faith was never my thing... No, no. Good to know that you share my ideas." his smile became a little sharper than before.

"You could join us if you wanted, you would be very welcome even. Along with the questioners ..." He said in a slightly softer voice ... Almost a purr as he watched the colors reappear in an environment that was dark before the night started dissipating.

He heard the Archangel burst into tears and knew that this wasn’t the best time for words, but ... He just couldn't leave him feeling disconsolate as he was. Lucifer slowly approached and wrapped him in a simple, gentle embrace from the side, just to warm him up, and perhaps to minimize the pain that the other felt without many ready phrases or cliché words. Maybe it was for the best. He went slowly back and forth rocking him. "Please don't cry ... An Archangel so beautiful like you doesn't fit with so many tears ..." He said in a whisper.

What relationship was Lucifer referring to? Aziraphale hoped it was just a more or less random phrase, but when it came to Lucifer, what wasn’t on purpose? Raphael just didn't suspect it yet.

"Are there so many ones who think so? I don't know ... on the one hand, I think we should obey. She made the rules for our own sake ... However, I can't agree with everything. Maybe I have a problem as a celestial entity" He supposedly he wasn’t perfect, like everyone else.

It seemed that Lucifer's group was made up of conspirators. It was what his intuition told him at first. "But ... if your lads can understand me ..." Raphael was definitely up to try anything now. He had lost Aziraphale… And felt definitely alone after screwing everything up.

When the tears came, the feeling of panic at being discovered in his secret with the Principality surfaced and he, for that reason, wept without further explanation, letting himself be comforted, in a strange feeling of familiarity with the older Archangel, who he had never met before, and in the end, he forced a smile. "You're right. I shouldn't be crying over small things. It was just a moment. It will pass."

If Lucifer forgot about it and he could just go home ...

Lucifer made it very clear in his sentence that he suspected that he and the other Angel had some kind of serious relationship. After all, was he there bursting into tears for nothing? For a simple friendship? Lucifer would never buy that ... There had to be something more to justify such an attitude. He just assumed that Raphael was just too naive to realize that he already knew that.

"If you have a problem we all have it. Because we really don't obey or blindly trust what She has taken for granted just because She ordered it." He said with a shrug. Questioning has always been his religion, so to speak. And what he didn't agree with was that She said ... Yes, he would act and think according to his own way ... He would be more correct and happier, according to his own thinking and that of his own subordinates.

"In addition to understanding we can welcome you ...." Lucifer said more simply, not wanting to look like a transgressor. After all, he was an Archangel like him, why would Raphael distrust his word if he wouldn't hurt his similar?

Lucifer there however didn’t want to say anything that would refer to the fact that he already knew what was going on between the two and all that weeping. He just wanted Raphael to feel safe with him ... to be by his side.

"It's okay ... I promise that what you tell me here will stay here." He said it simply in a whisper in the truest tone he could manage. He really wouldn't tell anyone what happened ... If Raphael stayed on his side, of course. Weak and alone without Aziraphale would be easier.

Raphael tried to redeem himself. In any case, he didn't want to expose too much about what had happened, so he took a deep breath and looked away, focusing on Lucifer's words. They seemed very bold even to himself. Disobey Her… He was even more confused.

"I ... I don't know where the truth is. Obeying blindly is certainly not the way, but disrespecting Her, no either ..." He said with a fleeting smile, which showed a certain fear of making a decision, especially at a difficult time like that. His feeling were all mixed up inside.

"Welcoming? I’ve never heard that expression ..." Oh, of course. Angels had no mother or father. They just had Her as a creator, genitor. And She wasn’t available physically to comfort them when they were afraid or sad. It was as it had always been. How could it be different?

"Ah ... I don't really know what to say. Really ... I just really liked this friend of mine. But something went wrong between us. We… fought for a reason that even I didn't understand ... when everything seemed to be going right. Now I don’t think we’ll see each other anymore… Can you understand?” That was what had happened in the best way he could explain. Lucifer was experienced. Perhaps he could fill in the blanks.

"The truth is in following what you, your mind and heart think right, not what they tell you it is." Lucifer promptly countered. It was and wasn’t true, what Raphael and his subordinates would think should go according to what he himself thought, otherwise it wouldn't make any sense. Even so, he left the sentence in the air, knowing full well that the other Archangel was not entirely blindly in favor of everything She preached. It was just a matter of time to make his mind.

"Yes, welcoming is the term I use when ... We get one more to side with us... They feel welcomed... In a way, after wandering around alone for so long without friends or anyone truly bonded with...." he emphasized the alone part that now Raphael was really lonely after he had a fight with his only true "friend". So maybe he thought he would be his savior.

"Oh, I see ..." He said again, looking saddened and fake overly concerned for the other. "Do you ... Do you intend to go after this friend of yours to fix things ...? Or do you think there's no way of going back to how things were?" The Archangel asked curious approaching more and offering his body heat in a side hug involving the shoulders of the other.

Raphael seemed surprised by the direct answer. He was just like himself, only older and more determined. "Y-you're right, I think ... I always said it myself ... But ... I don't think I really meant it. Not with such strong conviction… L-like you." He murmured the last words between looking at Lucifer and the lake. The Archangel was so beautiful. His beauty was almost unreal. Something that borders on the unbelievable.

"Do you have a kind of formalized group?" He asked, finding it strange that a kind of faction existed within Paradise, where everything always seemed divided according to the will of God herself. Therefore, it seemed that the will of the Angels prevailed. He was being captured by all those news. "I ... still have friends. They just ... don't think this way ..."

"I don't know ... The way he acted, honestly scared me. He ... crossed the line with me ... Even so, I would like ... to be able to go back ..." Raphel looked to the way he had come there, as if imagining that Zira remained in the same place of their fight and then returned to lean on the shoulder of his so dedicated friend and perfect Archangel. "What ... would you do in my place?" He asked absentmindedly admiring the lake’s colors.

Lucifer saw him stutter and smiled even more openly. It was working. "Yes, my dear, of course I am right, one day when you join us, you will be able to see that more clearly, I’m sure." He said it discreetly but full of himself. Lucifer was sure that now Raphael would have nowhere else to go but to follow him.

"You will soon get used to the idea and will soon be defending it ..." he laughed softly looking at the other Archangel with a different shine in his gray eyes.

His caress didn’t stop on Raphael's shoulder so his attention wouldn’t be diverted. "No ... It would be too obvious for Her." He said quickly, shaking his head. "It is something where only we know and where only the trustworthy ones are able to enter." He said with a more flirtatious smile, inducing the thought that Raphael was someone worthy of joining them.

"But would _your_ friends still be friends if you changed your mind?" He said making sure that his "best friend" the one named Aziraphale wouldn’t be anymore. He would definitely abandon him if not try to separate them.

"Go back with someone who has crossed the line?" He laughed not believing what he heard "Raphael ... You can't give him another chance or he'll always think he can cross the line with you ... It's a matter of respect." The Archangel said assertively knowing which was the broken "limit" well.

"I would leave the past where it belongs. Didn’t he come after you, did he?" He said more seriously, inducing the Archangel's thoughts, looking at the lake now emotionless. The caressing stopped suddenly, as if he was suddenly dissatisfied with that other's gaze away in another direction. I was either with him or the other.

Raphael had to make a quick decision. And Lucifer wasn’t the one who shared. Much less being around a lower-ranking Angel who certainly didn't think like himself. Raphael's head on his shoulder made him smile again and the affection returned, pulling him closer now.

"Yes ... but of course I-I’ll have to think about it." Raphael said still unsure. It seemed like a big commitment in some way. With a big and serious cause. And this cause still seemed to him of a conspiratorial nature. Even if they were Angels. If only he could prove the goodwill of Lucifer and the others in the group someway...

"Oh, I see ... but they say that She sees everything. Isn't that so?" They couldn’t hide from God, right? Who really could? He felt that what had happened to Aziraphale and he had been seen by Her at least felt in a certain way and that was what made him most uncomfortable. Was it just a silly thought of him? "Most of them would certainly abandon me ..." He spoke defeated. Would Aziraphale too?

"You are ... you’re right!" He finally spoke with some certainty. Zira couldn't be forgiven so easily for what he had done, even if they were close friends ... he had practically forced him. In fact ... he did. That wasn’t fair. It wasn't right. He looked back again.

"Yeah ... he didn't come after me in the end..." Nor would he. Raphael was right. Lucifer had a point. He was disrespected. "I can't go back if he thinks about continuing to do the same things to me." Raphael said wanting to cry inside, but making a difficult decision on the outside.

"Well, if She sees everything and hasn't done anything to stop us yet ..." Lucifer shrugged. For him, he was above anything She could do, above even Her. He had his own way of acting and thinking and his own followers that were above Her. Someone like him didn't need anyone's approval to go ahead. Only more individuals by his side. Strength. That was what really mattered.

"What wonderful friends you have..." He said with an air of disdain and pity. "Real friends don't abandon others simple as that." He said in retaliation. Logically, he would abandon Raphael to his own luck if he gave up being by his side and sharing his train of thought, but now it didn't matter. Raphael was too naïve to know that. Everything was going according to what he wanted.

Lucifer smiled widely when he heard he was right. Nothing was more pleasurable for that Archangel than having his ego stroked. "I ... I know it hurts now, Raphael ... But it shall pass soon," he said in a velvety voice, almost purring, raising his hand slowly and stroking his fire-colored hair to calm him down and help in this moment of decision. So manipulative.

" _I would never do anything to you without your permission..."_ He said seriously but inside wanting to laugh. All this for a simple kiss? What kind of line he crossed when clearly Raphael was in love or at least had strong feelings for Aziraphale? He couldn't believe that. Perhaps Raphael didn't like Aziraphale as much as Lucifer once had thought. It was just a matter of time for him to really dislike the other.

"It's like passively agreeing ..." Raphael concluded the other's reasoning. And that reasoning would one day be his ruin. He supposed when She is silent, She is agreeing, because we all know that women do NOT do this. They can be silently upset for a long time, which does not mean they agree with what is happening. But perhaps that wasn’t the way Lucifer thought. And it was in this extreme self-confidence that his weakness laid.

"It's true. But we saw that it takes much little for friends to go away," he said with a bit of a grudge. The right feeling maybe for Lucifer to be able to win it. Raphael, always so kind, resentful.

"Yes ... it probably will ... Just as it came, it will go away ..." He referred to the feeling he had for Aziraphale. That in fact will never go away, we know well. "I ... I'm sure you did." Raphael's eyes widened a little at the Archangel as if thinking of the repercussions of those words.

"Something like that ... it won't happen again ... You have my word." It wasn't the kiss that was the problem, but the way Zira had run with what he wanted and had practically crossed all the barriers of mutual respect. He trusted him! Yes, he was hurt, sad. In almost equal measures...

"Exactly. If he wanted, he would have stopped us already" Lucifer said proudly as if he knew all the steps that the Almighty would take before She even made them. If he was smarter than the creator of everything.

"Sometimes takes even less than you think for friends to turn their backs," he said, shaking his head in disbelief and sadness. Many abandoned him in his endeavor ... Some that he even considered "friends".

"It has already happened to me, Raphael ... I know exactly how you’re feeling. I have also been replaced in a heartbeat like that ..." he admitted ruefully as if revealing a great secret. He wanted to increase the other's hurt and resentment by using his own with an example.

"I'm glad to know that." He smiled stroking his hair and getting closer to his face "So we have a deal? Would you like to know my people and their way of thinking? Leave the past behind?" By past He meant "Aziraphale" but he wouldn't say it out loud.

"Certainly ..." Raphael spoke as if trying to convince himself of that. After all, if She never came to give an opinion, how would they know if everything that was passed on as knowledge really came from Her, or had the finger of the Angels? It was another level of conspiracy inside his mind.

He remembered when Miguel spoke to him and concluded that Angels of different castes being separated was useful only to Angels themselves in higher hierarchies. "Really? How did it happen?" He asked a little sweeter, wanting to know the other's story.

"Yes, we do have a deal." Ah, what a deal. We all know what it means. "Your people?" Was that what he called them? Like they were different from everyone else? "Well, I can give myself a new chance," he said simply.

Lucifer sighed, he knew the other would ask about what had happened to him. It was something he wouldn’t like to remember, but if he really wanted to have the Archangel by his side, some "sacrifices" should be made.

He stopped the affection with his hand and went back a little so he could look into the other's eyes. _"I ... I fell in love once, Raphael."_ He confessed as if that secret was a weakness he was sharing.

"I fell in love with a beautiful creature" He said smiling with a longing look "Short stature, blue eyes, straight black hair, white skin, a charming smile, lucky me ..." he laughed softly.

"But ... she abandoned me." He said, frowning, his eyes showing hurt and full of resentment "She said he didn't agree with the way I thought and that would be my ruin one day..." he shook his head in denial. "I suddenly found myself lost without her." He blinked to hide his teary eyes.

"It was a huge shock for me. I just had her by my side." He sniffed. That wasn’t a lie at all, Lucifer wished it was. "Then I discovered that there could be others around me who shared my way of thinking .... And I started to form my own family so to speak ... My people, that's why I call them that, I started the idea." He explained quickly. "She now has her own friends and maybe a love ..." he rolled his eyes. "I hope she is happy."

"Oh ... I'm so sorry ..." Raphael said after hearing the story, letting his own eyes water while he seemed to find in Lucifer's tale something similar to the situation he was experiencing. He didn’t know if he had been abandoned for real... but the fact is that Aziraphale hadn’t come after him. And time was passing by quickly...

Every time he looked back he thought about it. Maybe he would come later ... but no, he should have come to apologize immediately... He frowned as his thoughts mixed with the sad story experienced by the other Archangel. Empathy was what he felt that moment.

He wondered if he had ever seen someone with that description that Lucifer presented to him, but he didn't ... he didn't remember anyone.

"I ... I'm really sorry, you didn’t deserve something like that happening to you..." He said with a broken voice to the point of tears, not for the other of course. It was all mixing up inside and Raphael was getting confused.

"I think ... if I find people who 'welcome' me ... maybe I feel better, don't I? It should hurt less…" He said with a sigh, trying to ignore the suggestion that he maybe find someone else to love. He couldn't think of that. Not yet, his feelings were still too strong for Aziraphale to be ignored like that ... But he pretended to understand that it might be the best for him.

"I'm going to rest now. Sleep ... for real. All these things are making my head hurt. But tell me when and where to appear. I'll be there ..." His eyes lingered one last time on the path behind him and when nothing seemed to come, he looked back at Lucifer and practiced a weak smile. You know when they say it is easier to win a broken heart? So...

Lucifer nodded gently, letting the Archangel go, after saying the place and time of his appearance. "I hope you come, I'll be looking forward to it." He said with a sweeter smile and took the other's hand, "I promise you won't regret it." He had to pass on some security to Raphael at all costs, he couldn't go back to Aziraphale, not now.

He got up slowly. "I'm going to go my own way too, I have a few chores to do and I imagine you want to rest after a busy night." he said almost purring "It was a pleasure to meet the famous star maker Raphael."

_And there the deal between the two took place, ended with a friendly handshake and it was still not known what the fate reserved for them._


	9. Apart

Soon the rest of the night went by and the day started like any other. Except for Aziraphale. That night was particularly disturbing for the Angel. After Raphael ran away, Azi was unable to follow him. His heart said something but his legs didn’t respond. He was petrified as the image of the Archangel grew smaller and smaller until it disappeared on the horizon.

Aziraphale started to cry for a few minutes right there, without the strength to chase him. Even so, he didn't regret what he did. Never in his wildest dreams did he think he would be able to kiss the Archangel in real life ... And he just had. Even though it might have cost a lot. He couldn't understand why he had run away ... Maybe Raphael had his reasons and needed a moment alone, that was totally understandable and Aziraphale silently allowed him to have it.

After recovering, he walked slowly back to his home, refusing to follow the Archangel and disturb him even more, which could make the situation even more difficult to resolve. Perhaps a few hours of sleep could help both of them.

When he lied down he could realize that he didn't feel guilty about what he had done at all, just an intense fear ... Fear that it might have some punishment. Especially for Raphael, he would never forgive himself for that. Maybe he should apologize ... But he was afraid that the other one was mad at him. Maybe the Archangel didn't even want to work with him anymore. It broke his heart to no end, making more tears wash over his face. It just hurt too much.

After a few moments Aziraphale surrendered to his exhaustion, allowing to rest a little after the rough night. Just to have his Archangel invading his dreams ... Maybe since the very beginning he got it all wrong and Raphael didn’t like him with the same feelings he had... It could all have been a mistake. Yes, now definitely he had to ask for forgiveness for what he did, but now it was too late ... Maybe later when Raphael was calmer.

What Aziraphale couldn't understand was why Raphael ran away ... For him it was something so expected, even predictable. Not something… all wrong. It would happen and that was it. Was it due to his most intimate touch? He just let himself be carried away by his instincts.... It seemed like something to do when someone really have a strong feeling for other one ... Raphael might not be ready either. Scared even.

There were many unanswered questions, and now he couldn't speak to the Archangel and simply ask him. Aziraphale would just hope for the best and prepare for the worst. He just hoped that Raphael wanted to be at least his friend after all this, friendship was better than just the pain of missing him.

Raphael slept for most of the day and woke up just before the sun was setting. His first thought fell on him, heavy as an anvil, and squeezed his chest with the same intensity, making him discouraged from anything to be done that day, which wasn’t normal in the life that the Archangel had led until then.

He didn't know what that feeling was, but he attributed it only to the fact that he thought he had lost Aziraphale for real. He sighed heavily and just got ready.

Not knowing what to do about the disagreement with his 'co-worker', he called another Angel who participated in the creation of Stars and sent him to inform Aziraphale that he should be in Heaven at the usual time, without clarifying whether or not they were talking.

Aziraphale wasn’t so lucky as the Archangel. He couldn't sleep much, so he continued to work on his drawings and descriptions, perfecting them, training to try to ask for his "job" back if Raphael wanted to fire him.

His working hour was coming fast and the Angel was already getting anxious. He didn't know if he should go, stay ... Until an Angel already known came with the message that he should go to work. It was a relief for him.

He ignored the twinge of pain in realizing the detail of having been another Angel who went to speak to him and not directly Raphael himself. It could mean many things, one of which is that the Archangel should still be mad at him or not want to talk to him anymore ... He just knew that a good thing it wasn’t. Well, at least he hadn't lost my job.

In a blink of an eye, he was impeccably clean and trembling with anxiety but ready. He waited for Raphael silently, looking around, wondering where he would come from.

It didn’t occur to Raphael to fire Aziraphale because of a personal matter, although if, in fact, they still didn’t speak, it would be painful to see him every night. He was sure of that.

Part of him still hoped that the Principality was still preparing a speech to ask for forgiveness, but perhaps he just expected too much. The other's understanding of what had happened between them was totally divergent between both ones.

As agreed, he showed up for work, watching Aziraphale sideways and preventing him from noticing his glance. His Angel looked tired. Well ... it wasn't that anymore ... "his".

He gathered the Angels for a moment, as he always did, indicating what each one would do and started by himself, something that was also customary. He silently did his job, without implying anything.

In the end, he allowed himself to aim at the Principality only once, looking sad and hurt at the same time. Then he indicated that the work would go on without him, as if he intended to leave.

Aziraphale was even scared to work. It seemed like a normal night if it weren't for what had happened before. He tried to appear as nonchalant and normal as possible so as not to hinder the smooth running of things.

He made his notes but from time to time he looked sideways at the Archangel. Once he could see that Raphael was looking at him, but the Principality couldn’t understand what that different sparkle in his eyes meant. He became increasingly anxious and indecisive about what to do next.

Did Raphael expect an apology? Talk to him? Several times he found myself with these thoughts and just couldn't write anymore. He was very confused about the other's expectations. Aziraphale sighed at the end of the job, a little more determined to at least to go and talk to him, his head was killing him with so many unanswered questions .... Plus that deeply sad look he received didn’t help at all

Leaving the place and returning to the known paths in Paradise, where the night was nothing more than a sad companion at that moment Raphael remembered when he used to watch the stars with Aziraphale, now just a memory, perhaps unlikely to repeat itself.

His feet took him back to the place, now familiar, where the Angel's cherry tree was. Perhaps he hoped that the other would decide to appear there, that they could talk and ... everything would be fine. Or it was just his delusion. Of those that you have when you want something so deeply that you begin to visualize an improbability as something possible.

He sat under the tree, letting the petals of flowers fall on him as if they were a touch of affection he missed. It was Zira's tree, so in a sense, a part of it was there. Soft, a good smell, somehow it reminded his of his beloved Angel. Then he began to wait, what for? He didn’t even know if it would really happen. At that moment he was looking at the path for a long time, as he had done last night.

Aziraphale after work, still quite confused and agitated, tried to organize his thoughts around where Raphael might be at that moment. He had to find him somehow.

He tried where they met the first time ... No. He walked over to where the other one liked to rest. Neither. Until he thought of going to the least likely place he thought at the time. _His place._ Would Raphael even visit the same place where the fact that separated the two happened? Something that should still cause a lot of pain ... He swallowed hard and headed over there.

To his surprise, his thoughts were correct. There was the Archangel. Serene ... Under his tree. Petals around him. In the place that was once his. Aziraphale smiled momentarily. It was really a beautiful image.

Before even taking the first step in his direction, something took his courage away. Simply drained it. The Angel froze in place. Who he thought he was to disturb the peace of the other? Raphael didn't even look sad at the time, he didn't look broken or in despair ... He looked even happy ... Aziraphale had no right to spoil that. He took a step back and chickened out.

Maybe things should really stay as they were ... Separated, as it should be. Each one in a way. Maybe one day Raphael would explain himself why he ran away when he felt more comfortable and not with Aziraphale forcing him again as he forced that kiss.

He bit his bottom lip and sighed in defeat. He definetely shouldn't do any more damage than he already did. He took advantage that the other hadn’t seen him and started to draw a sketch of the Archangel under the cherry tree. He didn't want to miss this opportunity of that perfect angle, the Principality didn't know how long Raphael would be there so he would have to be quick.

Raphael waited for what he considered a long time. He was patient, but even for him, in that situation, it seemed endless, as if everything dragged on. Not even the firmament seemed to move. Until he finally found what he was waiting for hopeless. Aziraphale didn’t even know he was there… How would he just appear out of the blue?

With the frustration of not having fulfilled his desire of finding his Angel there, he gradually withered, a palpable discouragement that told him that things would never be the same ever again.

However, he wasn’t ready to accept that yet. Getting used to the lack of the other was something that would take a long time for sure. A part of him wanted the process of acception to take time, because he didn't really want to forget Zira completely. Like a plucked flower that won't be allowed to die.

Over time, he realized that there was really no point in waiting. Lucifer was waiting for him at his secret meeting place, early in the morning and Raphael hadn’t slept at all.

He got up and walked through the woods in the forest that the older Archangel had explained to him earlier and was soon by the lake. He threw a pebble at it, just as the other had done, thinking to himself, that like concentric circles in water, an action can trigger a series of unstoppable events.

Aziraphale silently ended his drawing as long as the Archangel remained there. Raphael didn’t notice his presence, nor did he seem to change his countenance. He seemed slightly insensible by the recent situations ... But far less sad than Aziraphale thought he would be. His own heart was broken but all the emotion of sadness turned to beauty in its melancholy sketch. Just not being able to show it to his inspiring muse.

When he saw Raphael leave, he tried to do the same, going his own way. He imagined that the Archangel would now rest after the night of work as he always did ... And he wouldn’t disturb that either. The Principality sighed and left quietly without being noticed.

Lucifer, on the other hand, approached the Archangel and touched his shoulder when he saw that he really came on time for their meeting "Raphael! I am immensely happy that you are here. On time as expected." He laughed softly "I had the liberty to bring some friends of mine if you don't mind." he pointed to the Angels close to him, with the same comforting and inviting smiles as he had.

Raphael was surprised to find Lucifer. He thought they would meet later. It was like being followed closely. And perhaps this will prove to be true later on. He turned a little red when he found himself surrounded by strangers who clearly showed a disconcerting goodwill towards him.

"I thought the meeting would be later. At the appointed place. But that's okay. It's a pleasure to see you again! And meet your friends. Where are we going?"

Raphael didn’t know the concept of clandestine and didn’t believe that the group needed to be in a very shady place. After all, they were Angels. They only discussed ideas that the other Angels didn’t have in mind. Nothing wrong with that right?

Lucifer was actually following him closely since before, he had previously seen that the two didn’t meet. He wondered why, but that was something positive. He knew that. Without Aziraphale on the way, the approach would be much easier.

The three continued to smile despite the other's lack of apparent clumsiness. "I'm sorry for the rush, but those ones here couldn't wait to meet you" He pointed to the two who seemed anxious. "These are Azazel and Kesabel." both nodded condescendingly.

"So you are the Raphael we hear so much about, the pleasure is all ours" began Kesabel. She was a very beautiful female, with long blond hair and blue eyes, a charming smile. "Let's meet our other comrades, today I managed to get everyone together just to meet you" Lucifer said proudly of his achievement, not directly mentioning where it would be, but that there would be more Angels for sure.

Raphael tried to appear a little more sociable. He didn't want to denounce that the proximity to 'Zira's secret place' made him a little nervous. Even without speaking, he still wanted that place to remain just the two.

Azazel followed more or less the same physical pattern as Kesabel, but he was more discreet and mysterious. Well, at least those were the superficial insights that Raphael had of them so far. Kesabel was someone that the Archangel couldn’t put in words, such a beauty.

"It will be interesting to have such a talented and intelligent Archangel at our side." said Azazel briefly, not wanting to delay the meeting.

"Thank you both for the compliments," said Raphael. "It's my pleasure. I hope to be a valued member of the group, that's all." He completed with a smile and waited for Lucifer to lead the way again.

Lucifer on the other hand had nothing of interest in that place, despite having been very closely watching them both. He personally felt that now it meant nothing to Raphael since they were no longer together ... And all it brought was the memory of the kiss that tore them apart. It was a matter of time to forget that goofy Angel and that stupid cherry tree.

Kesabel could only smile and nod, her curly hair danced as she moved, her eyes with an almost innocent glare. This combination of her appearance could won over anyone.

Lucifer saw that his subordinates were acting exactly as he asked them to do, they were perfect and convincing just like they did with any Angel they wanted to join them.

"Well, shall we go? It is almost time for the meeting and we must be punctual, especially with the presence of a new sublime member." He smiled widely and started walking with the others, promptly following him.

"We are at 10 counting on me." Now 11 with Raphael. "Each with a duty and a skill for the greater good of all." He said trying not to mention directly what "skills" or what "the greatest good" were.

Maybe with his new 'friends' Raphael would actually forget, or maybe, just put the thought of Azirphale and his broken heart aside for a while. Some feelings are more persistent than we expect them to be.

Raphael felt that everyone treated him very well. Was that for real? Was that what Lucifer called 'being welcomed'? After all, with the exception of what he had recently experienced, no one had ever been particularly warm to him, not least because Angels are not normally like that. Azazel also started to walk, putting himself almost beside Kesabel.

"Yes, let's go ..." He agreed with Lucifer, walking closer to him. The Archangel's joke did not go unnoticed either, although Raphael tried to ignore this kind of comment. It was tempting, however. That whole atmosphere was ... comforting in the situation Raphael was in. For a moment, he had almost forgotten the sadness he felt for Aziraphale not having appeared at all.

He heard Lucifer comment. "10? That’s a lot…" He asked rhetorically. At the same time, he wondered if he had the ability that group needed. Lucifer had created a great expectation in him to participate in whatever they had. A place for Angels 'like him'.

Lucifer kept his head up, sure that everything was going to be all right, Raphael would stay by his side and even before he realized the Archangel would have forgotten everything he had lived before. Superb, has always been its greatest feature.

Kesabel laughed quietly looking from time to time at the Archangel, making sure to stay close. She really wanted him to feel welcomed and part of something, she had been informed by Lucifer that he wasn’t someone known for having many friends or for seeing hanging around with company, just being known. Therefore, they would be responsible for promoting this new sensation to the star maker. Friends and belong to something. So everything would be easier.

"A lot?" Lucifer laughed "Raphael, my dear, we are in thousands ... Only 11 is not a meaningful number" he shrugged while explaining. If they were right and powerful it was something to take into account, yes. It could cause damage and hinder the smooth running of Heaven. Change the course of things. Convince more Angels to join them.

Arriving at the right place it was at the middle of the forest. There were the rest of the aforementioned Angels. Everyone had kind and affectionate faces, as if welcoming the newest member. "Raphael, these are _my_ Angels, _my_ friends and companions." Each one introduced themselves bowing and shaking his hand in the act, polite and inviting.

Raphael, although he had no family and didn’t know the meaning of the word, felt that what those strangers were trying to do with him was different from what he had already felt. It seems they wanted to protect him, surrounding him affectionately in a positive way. It made him feel good. On the other hand, when he was with Aziraphale, his presence was enough to make him feel happy, nothing else.

"Yes ... I mean, so many who think differently. I don't think it's a good thing for Angels to have a thought that is different from rules and customs." He commented more explicitly, what he thought was enough to make Lucifer understand what he had been able to accomplish.

Raphael looked around, all those faces, mostly never seen, but that seemed friendly and politely greeted each one, with a smile. It was the beginning of a new phase in the existence of the Archangel. Little did he know it would have such dire consequences.

"Nonsense, my dear." Lucifer said and everyone laughed because it was precisely the questioning of all the new arrivals when they had just joined the group. How could so little change so much? However, Lucifer was very confident in himself and the way he saw ant expected thing to happen. Raphael just had no idea how big his ego was.

"They are just used to following orders and never questioning" He rolled his eyes in disgust. "We are one step ahead of that blind obedience." He smiled more widely.

"I saw this questioning flame burning in you when you mentioned that we should treat Angels of smaller and larger castes in the same way, after all we are all heavenly beings." Everyone agreed. That thought went against what She said.

There, everyone treated each other as equals, except for following Lucifer ... He was like a superior, but they were already so used to it since he was the one who headed everything that was fair enough to give him credit for his courage. _Fools._

"Well, shall we start?" He said indicating for each one to introduce themselves properly, thus starting the first meeting of many that would happen from then on. They talked about what they disagreed with divine laws, their abilities and assignments in heaven, what they did… All sorts of things to get to know each other better.

Raphael solved his doubts and questions deciding to join them officially, until the day rose again. Now he just hoped Aziraphale would be called to join in too ... After all, he wasn't talking to him. But now with a sincere desire to call him to tell those great news.

While away from there, a certain Angel with blond hair, almost white, embraced carefully a drawing now colored and finished as if trying to reach and keep his friend closer to him. Tears washed over his rosy face like the petals of his cherry tree. Low broken sobs invaded the room.

" _Raphael…"_ was the name that escaped his lips in a whispered and painful call. His only concern and only thought.

_Would the Principality lose him forever?_

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Tumblr](https://mabsgatos.tumblr.com/)  
> Find @Redboozter on [Tumblr](https://redboozter.tumblr.com/)  
> 


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